Kid Definitions for Godly Character Traits

In the last several months, I've been focused on teaching my kids several key Godly character traits.  We don't go over them every day, but I try to review the ones that we're struggling with a few times a week.  After breakfast, in the car, during a conflict, at dinner, whenever.  

The original definitions seemed a little above their heads, so I came up with some kid-friendly versions that they can actually apply to their lives.  Take a look; I welcome any additional, simplistic input that you might have!

Disclaimer: Please ignore the grammatical errors!  I try to keep the explanations to my kids short and understandable at their ages.

Orderly

Big kid definition - Arranged or disposed in some order or patter; governed by law, well behaved.

Little kid definition - Keeping things neat; being well-behaved.

Attentive

Big kid definition - Mindful, observant; heedful of the comfort of others.

Little kid definition - Being aware of the people and things around you.

Teachable

Big kid definition - Capable of being taught; apt and willing to learn.

Little kid definition - Willing to learn.

Obedient

Big kid definition - Submissive to the restraint or the command of authority; willing to obey.

Little kid definition - Doing what you're told, right away, without being reminded.

Respectful

Big kid definition - An act of giving particular attention; high or special regard; esteem.

Little kid definition - Treating someone as more important than yourself.

Honest

Big kid definition - A fairness and straightforwardness of conduct; adherence to the facts.

Little kid definition - Telling the truth.

Forgiving

Big kid definition - To grant relief from payment; to pardon.

Little kid definition - (My kids know what this means, but I can't neatly sum it up...any ideas...???)

Peacemaker

Big kid definition - One who promotes harmony in personal relations.

Little kid definition - Having a good attitude; no complaining or arguing.

Courageous

Big kid definition - Mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear or difficulty; brave.

Little kid definition - Being brave.

Discerning

Big kid definition - Showing insight and understanding.

Little kid definition - Trying to understand all different situations.

Content

Big kid definition - Feeling or showing satisfaction with one's possessions, status or situation.

Little kid definition - Being happy with what you have.

Servant-hearted

Big kid definition - Someone that works for someone else.

Little kid definition - Wanting to do things for others with a happy heart.

Thankful

Big kid definition - Expressive of thanks; well pleased; glad.

Little kid definition - Being happy with what you've been given.

Self Control

Big kid definition - Control of your feelings and behavior.

Little kid definition - Being calm, even when you feel excited, frustrated, angry or tired.

Loving

Big kid definition - Having affection or warm regard; tender.

Little kid definition - Showing others that you care about them.

Humble

Big kid definition - If you show humility, you are not too proud, and you recognize your own faults.

Little kid definition - Not bragging about what you're good at; knowing that you're not better than everyone else.

Prayerful

Big kid definition - Devout, earnest, sincere.

Little kid definition - Turning to God in prayer when things are good and bad.

Modest

Big kid definition - People who are modest are not boastful about their abilities, possessions or achievements.

Little kid definition - Not telling others how great you are; dressing without showing a lot of skin.

Joyful

Big kid definition - Happiness and delight in your heart that comes only from Jesus.

Little kid definition - Having a happy heart, no matter what happens.

Generous

Big kid definition - People who are generous are happy to use their time and money to help others.

Little kid definition - Giving money or time to help others.

Responsible

Big kid definition - Trustworthy, accountable; having or involving important duties.

Little kid definition - Doing the right thing whether or not someone tells you to.

Compassionate

Big kid definition - A feeling of sympathy for and a desire to help someone who is suffering.

Little kid definition - Showing others that you are sad that they are hurting.

Kind

Big kid definition - Friendly, helpful and generous.

Little kid definition - Being nice to others.

Patient

Big kid definition - Bearing pains or trials calmly or without complaint.

Little kid definition - Waiting without asking questions or complaining.

Diligent

Big kid definition - Characterized by steady, earnest and energetic effort.

Little kid definition - Trying your best; working hard at everything you do.

Faithful

Big kid definition - Loyal and trustworthy.

Little kid definition - Loving someone even when they make bad choices.

That was awkward.

I have no idea who to credit for this billboard or even the photo of the billboard, but this is just about as funny as it gets.

(If you didn't hear about Harold Camping's prediction that Saturday, May 21st, 2011 was when Jesus would return, read about it here.)

Teaching Godly Character

I recently stumbled upon this blog post, which lead me to the most amazing list of Godly Character Trait printables.

Each page has the definition of the trait, a picture to help your child associate that word, plus a scripture verse about the character quality. The traits include: orderly, attentive, teachable, obedient, respectful, honest, forgiving, peacemaker, courageous, discerning, content, servant-hearted, thankful, self control, loving, humble, prayerful, modest, joyful, generous, responsible, compassionate, kind, patient, diligent and faithful.

Every day at breakfast, we've been reviewing one of the character traits and discussing ways to practice it.  I also try to challenge Mike and the kids (and myself) to focus on that quality throughout the day. 

For example, the day we learned about being "attentive," we talked about looking for opportunities to help others without being asked.  Such as picking up trash on the ground at the park, wiping up spills in the kitchen and replacing the empty toilet paper roll in the bathroom.

I'm actually taking this a step further by praying for my kids to develop these character traits.  I took a spiral index card notebook and wrote one character trait per page.  I keep it in the bathroom and pray for the kids when I brush my teeth.  Every couple of days, I turn the page to pray for a new item. 

I love a nice, organized, simple way to teach my family Godly values and these printables have been fun and easy to review every day.  I hope they're helpful for you, too!

Scripture Memory for Young Kids

Last summer, Mike and I volunteered in Ryan's Kindergarten class at church and I was amazed at how quickly those kids learned the monthly scripture memory verse. Even long ones like, "Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another; forgive as the Lord forgave you." {Colossians 3:13} and "Now faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you do not see." {Hebrews 11:1}

I wrote out a few verses on note cards that I wanted Ryan to learn and, sure enough, he memorized them in a matter of days. What's funny is that Kaylin (two years old then) learned them by accident, too, just from hearing me review them with Ryan. Not to mention the fact that I learn along with the kids - and I've never been good at memorizing anything past song lyrics!



Through the school year, the verses were forgotten because I unintentionally refocused my energy on sight word flash cards and school work. But a few weeks ago, I tacked on the scripture memory verses to our daily Bible lesson and my little sponges are reciting the Bible once again.

Here are the passages that they know or are learning:

Do everything without complaining or arguing.
~ Philippians 2:14

The Lord detests lying lips, but He delights in men that are truthful.
~ Proverbs 12:22

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility, consider others better than yourselves.
~ Philippians 2:3

God has surely listened and heard my voice in prayer.
~ Proverbs 66:19

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
~ Ephesians 6:1

The Lord is my helper, I will not be afraid.
~ Hebrews 13:6

Do to others as you would have them do to you.
~ Luke 6:31

The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
~ James 5:16

Love the Lord with all your heart.
~ Psalm 3:5

The verbiege of some of these passages is pretty far above their level, but it gives me a great opportunity to explain concepts like detest, selfish ambition, humility, effective and righteous. And if I see an area that I'd like to focus on with the kids, I look up a teachable scripture verse and add it to our stack of note cards. (you can see the themes above that we've attempted to tackle: lying, selfishness, complaining, arguing, fear, the power of prayer, helpfulness, obedience, etc.)

The other day, Kaylin said something nasty to Ryan and he walked over to me and quietly said, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger." {Proverbs 15:1} I bit my lip and fought back tears of pride before finally mumbling, "That's right, buddy."

I know everyone has their own teaching style, but what works best for us is for the kids to repeat me as I break down the verse into chunks.

Luke 6:31...Luke 6:31
Do to others...Do to others
as you would have them...as you would have them
do to you...do to you
Luke 6:31...Luke 6:31

Repeat that a few times for a couple of days, then give them the opportunity to say the verse after you quote the address. Sometimes I need to help them with the first word or two, but soon they can say the whole sentence on their own.

Happy memorizing!!!

Q&A Wednesday - How I Met Jesus

Cybil asked, "I would love to know how you got to know Jesus."

I know I have readers from several different walks of faith and many more who don't know what they believe. I'm not hoping to start a debate with my answer to this question, I'm just going to share my experience.

I have gone to church as long as I can remember. My mom was raised Catholic, but we always went to Christian churches when I was young, eventually ending up at a Presbyterian church in the late 80s.

When I was a freshman in high school, an acquaintance invited me to be a part of a new after-school Bible study. I didn't know what was involved, but I was so desperate to find a place to fit in at my new school, I agreed.

In addition to the Bible study, I eventually began attending the youth group at our church as well as Young Life meetings with kids from school. I loved the relationships I made with the people in these groups. They were sincerely happy, but not perfect. They genuinely wanted to get to know me as a person, flaws and all. They accepted me without hesitation. As an awkward, hormonal teenager, that was so rare and refreshing!

It was during this time that I got to know Jesus apart from church... apart from religion. I began believing in God because I felt a change going on in my heart, not because a minister explained Him into existence. I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior just before I turned 16 years old and couldn't wait to learn and grow in my faith.

I didn't quite understand what a personal relationship with Jesus looked like until the end of college. I went through the Experiencing God Bible study and finally got it. Jesus wanted to be my best friend, my comforter and my guide through life. That study helped me to be still and listen for God's leading. My life has never been the same since.

Some of you reading this will not understand what I'm talking about because you're not quite there yet. But whether or not you believe it, Jesus wants a personal relationship with you. Not on Christmas and Easter, not on Sundays, but every day.

God loves you. Yes, you. He knows you and wants you to know Him.

If you are interested in getting to know Jesus, I'd recommend finding a Bible-based church in your area. If the first one doesn't seem like a good fit, keep trying. I'm not a fan of "church shopping," but the end result of finding a comfortable "church home" is an amazing reward. Not all churches preach complete Biblical truths, so be cautious of false teachings.

If you've had a bad experience with church, but still want to learn about Jesus, I'm happy to talk to you personally. If you have further questions that you want to ask in the comments, feel free. If you truly want to talk about this deeper, please email me and I'd love to chat by phone.

Do you ever wonder what John 3:16 says? You know - the scripture verse on signs at football games. "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

Do you have eternal life? If you were to die today, would you go to heaven?

What would you say if God asked you, "Why should I let you into My heaven?"

Q&A Wednesday - Keeping Commitments

So how do you like the sound of "Q&A Wednesday with Kay-tay" - ??? Yeah, too much. Just "Q&A Wednesday" is good. Here's my first post answering the Q that struck me the most. More A's to the Q's next Wednesday. Feel free to keep the Q's comin'!

Nat asked, “Have you ever backed out of a commitment? How did you do that? I ask, because sometimes we get ourselves in over our heads before we realize it, and before you know it, we have way too much going on to do it all, and then have to start saying no or even 'cancelling' some obligations. I'm teaching 2 classes at church and work full time and and and, the list goes on...and I'm feeling overwhelmed...it all happened so fast :)”

I probably have a unique answer to this, Nat, but I very rarely back out of commitments. Growing up, my mom made me stick to my first commitment 100% of the time. Period. If I agreed to have a sleepover and the next day a birthday party invitation came, I had to decline the party and stick with the sleepover. It created a strong sense of commitment in me from an early age and I learned to think long and hard before committing in the first place. My "yes" was always "yes" and my "no" was always "no."

When I met Mike, his standard response to any activity was, "I don't see any reason why not." What I quickly learned was that his statement left him a back door, just in case something better came along; which happened often since our single friends were such last minute planners.

This created a problem when we got married. For example, when he had a hard day at work and wanted to reschedule a dinner with friends that night, sparks flew in our house. He didn't understand that I did NOT cancel plans unless there was an emergency.

What I've finally learned after 10 years of marriage is that Mike's idea of a "full schedule" and mine are completely different. He'd like our family to be home together most evenings, doing only one outside activity during the week and one per day on the weekends. I'm very happy with a couple of weekly activities and a variety of morning, afternoon and evening plans on the weekend. So we've had to compromise.

As far as over committing, it doesn't bother me to say "no," but I know not everyone is comfortable turning others down. I think it's healthy to have boundaries and wish people could practice being honest and saying, "no" more often. For me, I plan down time into my days and weekends so that I don't burn out. But that comes easily because I'm a planner.

Also consider the fact that if your schedule is too busy, you can't make yourself available to help others that might have a last minute need. Would it throw your world into a tailspin if a neighbor asked you to watch their toddler while they took an older child to the hospital? Or if a co-worker started asking you questions about your faith on the way to the parking lot after work? Or if a friend called in tears after a fight with her husband? We all need to keep windows of time open for unexpected emergencies that we really don't want to say "no" to.

My recommendation is to know where your boundaries are as an individual and with your spouse. How much down time do you need? How much transition time do you need between activities? What kind of time will the commitment require outside of the actual event (planning, prep work, practice, coordination with other people's schedules) - take everything into consideration before agreeing to add something new to your calendar.

Nat, if you're feeling overwhelmed, it sounds like you might need to back out of one or two of your regularly scheduled commitments. Chances are that your outside commitments are forcing your personal commitments down the priority list.

I'd like to share some awesome advice I've heard many times: think about who else can do the jobs that you do. No one else can be a wife to your husband. You are the only mother to your children. You (likely) can't quit your job. But could a co-worker help with the new assignment that's causing you to stay late every night while everyone else goes home to their families? Can someone else teach the class at church? Can someone else host your monthly book club? Can someone else make signs for the neighborhood garage sale? Just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should do it. God loves your servant's heart, but not at the expense of your family, your personal needs (like sleep!) or your sanity.

I'd like to ask everyone else: What are your thoughts? How do YOU keep from over committing? What do you do once you realize you've over committed yourself?

The Gift of an Ordinary Day

What an amazing reminder this is...it's a little long, but well worth watching. Even if you only watch the first couple of minutes and don't get sucked in to watching the rest...you have to click play. It's just what I needed to hear today after a 4am blowout diaper (that flipped upside down...while still unwrapped...onto my pillowcase and sheets) and two bedtime accidents (one in the bed and one in the sleeping bag) causing a grand total of three extra loads of laundry.

But this video reminds me why I love my job. I love being a mom. Love, love, LOVE it.

The gift of time

Today I was given the gift of an hour of my mom's time. I looked around my trashed, post-Christmas house this afternoon while she was here and I started feeling claustrophobic. I'd gotten rid of the wrapping paper and ribbons and shoved most of the opened gifts back under the tree, but somehow, the house was littered with stuff everywhere. Dishes, new clothes, games, toys, instructions, boxes, packing supplies, containers, pieces and parts...I didn't know where to start.
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That's when my mom said, "Merry Christmas...I'll give you one hour and we'll see how much we can get done. Let's get started." I've always been a big advocate of setting the timer and racing against the clock, but it was even that much MORE motivating having someone race alongside me! My house was put back together in no time, one room at a time, one surface at a time and a couple of rooms are even more than straightened; they're actually clean, too. I've always told Mike that the gift I appreciate most is time off (I got a "Mom's Day Off" certificate for Christmas, among other amazing gifts) and I'm realizing that the gift of time is my absolute favorite.

Does anyone else have trouble accepting offers of help from others? I've definitely gotten better over the last few years at letting others help me. I remember a neighbor who offered to bring me a meal after I had Kaylin. When I gratefully declined (I barely knew her and didn't want to put her out) she seemed surprised and a little hurt. Later, a similar thing happened with me: I genuinely wanted to help someone and they politely refused. It was at that moment that I realized that when people offer to help, we should graciously accept - helping each other is what keeps kindness alive in our society!
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Since Jason arrived, I've accepted help from dozens of generous friends, neighbors and acquaintances. People have brought us meals, offered to watch our kids while we have a date, offered to help with grocery shopping and one friend even offered to bring her sleeping bag over and be my "night nurse" one evening so I could get a full 8 hours of sleep. Seriously! Who does that?!? I know some truly amazing people.
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I've learned (and am continuing to learn) that I shouldn't feel like I'm putting others out when they offer to help. They wouldn't offer if they weren't willing. And I'm realizing that I might not be in a financial position to help many of the people in need this holiday season, but I can certainly offer to give them some of my time.
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One year ago today, the morning after Christmas, a friend's husband passed away suddenly. She didn't work, there was no life insurance policy and she was instantly turned into a single mom with four kids, three of them under four years old. People came out of the woodwork anonymously donating cash and gift cards to help her financially. But when I asked her how else we could help, she answered that she was having trouble keeping up with her laundry. So in addition to meals, I coordinated a weekly schedule of people who were willing to pick up her laundry and return it clean and folded. Sometimes you just never know what's weighing someone down, so the best thing to do is ask.
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What can you do to help someone else this week? Think about it, even pray about it, asking God to lead you to someone you can help. Offer to babysit for a single mom, bring medicine or lunch to a sick friend, run errands for a busy co-worker or help an elderly neighbor shovel their driveway. (or mow their lawn for those of us in warmer weather!) Be genuine, be persistent and be bold. Now that the chaos of the Christmas season is dying down, start a cycle of generosity with people in your circle of influence. You'll be glad you did!

You Wanna Be Humbled?

Our church hosted an incredible speaker last weekend, Nick Vujicic. He's a young man from Australia who was born without arms or legs and has an amazing attitude that will leave you motivated and in awe. If you're like me, you will feel so silly for getting sucked into the petty woes of your daily life.
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The video is 45 minutes long but SO worth it. He packed out four services with lines wrapped around the building to get in.
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I don't know where you are on your spiritual journey, but please make time this weekend to sit down and listen to his incredible story; to absorb his optimism and his passion. Click here to watch the video or to listen to the audio. (Though it's so amazing to see him walking around and flipping through his Bible...I encourage you to watch the video!)
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Or you can watch it right here (if your computer will let you...)

This is God

A personal message from God to YOU:

This is God.

Today I will be handling all of your problems for you.
I do not need your help.

Have a nice day!

Can I get an "Amen?" My grandmother had this up on her fridge for the longest time. Too true! God doesn't need MY help. Isn't that refreshing?

Living for an audience of One

As Christians, we are supposed to live for an audience of one. THE One. I've heard this statement before. Many, many times. Our pastor says it now and again (in fact, he said it tonight), it comes up in Bible studies and accountability groups, this was not a new phrase for me. I understand the concept: live only for God.

But yesterday morning, I did a devotion that broke it down much more specifically. Don't be a good wife to please your husband, do it to please the Lord. Don't be a good mom to please your kids, do it to please the Lord. Be a good friend to please the Lord. Be a good daughter to please the Lord. Be a good employee to please the Lord, not to please your boss or co-workers. LIGHT BULB. NOW I get it! If I'm doing as God wants me to in terms of loving others by honoring my husband or guiding my kids or supporting my friends, their response or reaction should not matter. I shouldn't look for praise or appreciation from them. If I don't get recognized for my "efforts," I am not supposed to be affected because people are not my audience. GOD is. Duh! He is the only person in my audience. It is that simple.

It's tough to stay confident in the fact that I'm trying to live for an audience of one when we don't meet the earthly expections of others. For me, it's hard not to be affected by that. But my new hope is that I would not get wrapped up in those feelings. If I'm doing everything God wants me to do, sometimes I will not only not get praise, but I will receive criticism. That's the kicker! And the worst of it all, I think.

So that was my "ah ha" moment for the week and I wanted to share it with you. I suppose this should have made sense a long time ago. But I must be slow...