Partial Obedience = Disobedience

Ryan and I have been having a rough week. Wednesday, inparticular, was horrible. He argued with everything I said, wouldn't follow the simplest of instructions, I thought I was going to lose my mind.

Then yesterday when I volunteered in his class, I heard his teacher ask him to sit "right over here." He sat down as he was asked, but sat on another side of the circle. I know that she asked him to sit in a certain spot for a reason. Part of the reason may have been that there was so much empty space, but the main reason is that the only other room on the carpet for him to sit was next to a boy who had been causing trouble all morning and she wanted to keep distractions to a minimum. But Ryan sat next to this boy, leaving the wide open space (where he was instructed to sit) completely vacant.

That's when it occurred to me: partial obedience is disobedience in God's eyes. If Ryan isn't going to obey each part of a request from me or his teachers, he will most certainly try to find loopholes when it comes to obeying God. And who is responsible for making sure he understands that? ME. Light bulb moment.

I turned to the other volunteer mom and said, "Oh, we are SO working on that this weekend!" She said, "On Easter weekend?" Curses. Not good timing, but this needs to be re-guided very soon.

So this morning, I started the day a little differently. Before breakfast, I sat down with Ryan and we prayed. Actually, I prayed, he repeated what I said. We prayed that God would help him to listen and obey the first time and that he would remember to ASK not TELL when he wants to do something different than what's requested of him. (ie "Ryan, please sit back down at the dinner table," with a response of "May I please get myself a drink first?" instead of "No, I have to get my milk first.") Those are my two biggest issues: repeating my requests and being argued with. It feels like he never just DOES what's asked of him without a negotiation. It's exhausting.

I mentioned this to my mom today and she reminded me about "The Strong-Willed Child" by Dr. James Dobson. I just pulled it off my bookshelf and will be re-reading it this weekend. I vaguely remember skimming it when Ryan was two, but absolutely need a refresher course. And I find it hilarious that I thought he was strong willed THEN?! I need to get a handle on this problem before his teen years or I'm going to be in so much trouble...