Accountable Kids

I am completely hooked on this new program. It's called Accountable Kids and Ryan is a completely different kid since we started it a few weeks ago. A friend recommended it when I sent out that plea for "what do I do" to get Ryan on the right track at school. I read the book and we ended up buying the whole reward chart system. I originally wanted to recreate it on my own, but decided to get their system...it's done, it's easy, it works.

The idea is that you decide what "chores" your child will have to complete in the morning, afternoon, and nighttime. For Ryan's age, his chores include brushing his teeth, making his bed, taking his vitamins, things like that. Things we were having him do anyway. BUT with this chart, he is responsible for doing them himself. We don't nag him about "have you brushed your teeth yet?" and he is held accountable for doing his chores all on his own. When each set of chores are complete, he gets a ticket, which he turns in for things like watching tv, getting a piece of gum or playing his video game. Again, things he was already doing, but now he earns the right to do those things. Also, if he does something above and beyond, he gets extra tickets or if he does something he shouldn't, tickets are taken away.

Can I just say that our house is SO MUCH calmer now!!! I don't get nearly as emotional when he steals a toy from Kaylin or gets an attitude when I ask him to do something. I just say, "Go get me a ticket." And because the tickets hold value to him, he is very careful about behaving because he doesn't want his tickets taken away. He only gets a handful each day and he works really hard for them, so he truly understands.

There are also incentive cards to encourage a positive behavior (one of the things we're working on is having Ryan ask to be excused from the table and clear his place without being prompted) that help get desired behaviors parents want. It also reminds Mike and I to give praise for good behavior instead of falling into the "well it's about time...that's how he should act anyway" type of rut. So Ryan's not only working toward getting tickets and cards, but he's also hoping to get our praise. Eventually, you take away the reward and the behavior becomes a habit. And something new becomes the desired behavior that is rewarded.

I was putting all of my eggs in this basket because nothing else seemed to be getting us desired results. And this is actually working!!! We no longer spank or swat Ryan, no more time outs or toys or privileges taken away, we just take tickets. And it seems to sting even more. When he wants to watch tv and doesn't have any tickets, he has a little stack of extra chore cards that can earn him tickets. So he's asking me to vacuum the crumbs under the kitchen table or help set the table for dinner or put away his laundry.

If you have kids 3-14, you have to check this out. There are dozens of chore cards for kids of all ages, it's such a great system. I'm sold!