Intentionally Katie

When Inspiration Strikes, I Organize

2012-02-01T08:43:00.018-07:00

While preparing to pack for our vacation last week, I realized that our "Kids Closet" downstairs was a disaster. Not only was it unsightly, but there were too-small shoes mixed in with shoes without mates, not to mention that I was having a horrible time finding matching socks to bring on our trip.

If you look at the floor, you might be able to see why I was so overwhelmed. Beneath the heaping piles of nothingness, there were 6 baskets: 1 sock basket per child and 1 shoe basket per child. What a mess!

I immediately started tearing it apart.

Within 30 minutes, the task was complete. I pulled out dozens of shoes to sell or toss and a gazillion lonely, matchless socks.

I realized that the shoes in the baskets weren't getting worn, they were just getting buried and scuffed from stuff thrown on top of them. I gave the shoe baskets their own shelf and put play shoes in them, leaving the door cubbies for everyday and nicer shoes. There were so many extra pockets, I even put a few of my own shoes in there.

This made me want to rip apart other closets in the house, but I was too consumed with packing five people for an eight day trip. You may see more Spring Cleaning before and after pictures from me over the next few weeks, as inspiration strikes...!

January Goal Update

2012-01-31T12:36:00.001-07:00

photo credit

My goal for January was to end the month at the same weight as when I made my list of 12 Goals for 2012.

In short, I failed.

To be honest, I didn't expect to achieve this goal. But I couldn't bring myself to write, "Only gain 5 lbs by January 31st."

The goal was set on the 6th, then I proceeded to spend 12 of the remaining 25 days of January on vacation. First, on a business trip for a FOOD company and most recently on a pre-paid, all-you-can-stuff-into-your-face cruise. Not gaining weight was a lofty, but unrealistic, goal.

I ate and drank to my heart's content on my business trip, returning home 4 lbs heavier after merely 4 days. That week, I worked out like a crazy woman and ate modestly, losing all 4 lbs before leaving for the cruise.

Then the first few days of our family vacation were a joke: I didn't drink any alcohol (I can't imagine how many calories that saved me, considering my drinks of choice are all sugary, fruity concoctions) but I helped myself to more than my fair share of second helpings and desserts. By day 3, my pants were already snug and I felt disgusting.

So the latter half of the cruise, I was much more careful. I ordered egg-white omelets with veggies and oatmeal for breakfast and stuck to fish and salad for dinner. But I couldn't resist the desserts...they were heavenly! And I knew I was going to deprive myself once I was home, so I indulged.

I found a scale in the ship's gym toward the end of the trip and it said that I gained 15 pounds. I almost choked until my brother in law said that the scale weighed him as 20 lbs heavier than his pre-cruise weight, so I didn't take it too seriously. Regardless, it made the actual 5 lb weight gain much easier to accept when I got home to my own scale.

I hope to get a pound or two down under my January 6th weight by the end of next week, just in time to go on yet another business trip, where we'll be taste-testing all of the new food products for our upcoming catalog. That way, maybe I'll be even when I get off the plane on the 12th. It's warped logic, I realize, but it's keeping me from ballooning up from all of this travel in a short period of time.

I've already lost a couple pounds of water weight since Sunday, so I'm not too depressed about not meeting January's goal. I will end the month 3 lbs more than I'd hoped, but my diet is already substantially better than it has been and my body is craving more healthy food and regular exercise again.

Someone asked me recently how I don't fluctuate in clothes sizes. I gain and lose a few pounds here and there all the time, but the truth is: I only have one size in my closet. I'm comfortable in my own skin when I'm a size 10, so I got rid of all of the size 8s (I can dream, but I have to work too hard to stay that small) and the size 12s and 14s (oh yes, I was busting out of 14s during my college days).

The bottom line is this: if I only have size 10 clothes in my closet, I am forced to get serious about my food choices if they become snug.

So there you have it! I failed to meet my January goal, but I'm totally fine with it. Now to reset my body clock to begin getting up early to successfully accomplish February's goal tomorrow. No more vacation mode for me!

I'm ready for a vacation from my vacation!

2012-01-29T22:57:00.003-07:00

This evening, we returned from an amazing, week-long cruise to the Mexican Rivera. I just went through 231 new emails, returned 10 voice mails and a dozen texts, not to mention unpacking five suitcases and two backpacks, starting the first of many loads of laundry and giving my kids a proper bedtime routine for the first time in 10 days. My house is filthy (I was too overwhelmed last week to clean) and my car is a disaster. The car wash is calling to me.

(Does anyone else feel like you're rocking back and forth? No...? I think something's wrong with my office chair. Maybe I need to put on my sea bracelets one more time...just for tonight...)

This cruise was initiated as a 40th birthday gift to Mike from his parents. They treated our whole family, including Mike's brother, to this trip. Pretty incredible, right?

Some quick observations before sharing pictures:

- Cruising is an amazing way to travel! So much better than flying.

- Not everyone loves cruising.
- Not everyone loves cruising with small children.
- Cruising without small children is significantly more relaxing than cruising with small children. Especially when they are your own children.
- Cruising with small children will make certain husbands realize that they do not wish to cruise with small children ever again. And that our children's next cruise experience will not be prior to the 2020 decade.

- Not everyone loves the "intimate" cabin size of each room on a cruise ship...especially when productivity is required and antsy children are confined to this small space.

- Separate rooms for the kids (or separating an adult with each child) is a must.

- A baby monitor, specifically a video monitor, is a huge bonus while traveling: Naptimes can continue without an adult in the room. Halla!

- It is impossible to eat healthy portions on an all-you-can-eat cruise. Maybe not impossible for you, but it is seemingly impossible for me. And I have the new waistline to prove it.

- Escargot tastes fine when floating in butter and covered in bubbling cheese.

- Frog legs taste like chicken.

- 24 hour ice cream availability is dangerous for the Roose family. Myself excluded...my weakness was the Melting Chocolate Cake, which was only available once per evening. So I got one every. single. evening.

- Dessert after breakfast is a daily occurrence on cruise ships.

- Doing the Elliptical while on a moving vessel makes makes me want to vomit.

- Jogging while on a moving vessel makes me want to vomit.

- Walking at a steep incline while tightly grasping the top of the treadmill makes me queasy, but not fully nauseous.

- Experiencing the post-workout headrush on a moving vessel also makes me want to vomit.

- Talking about vomit while my head still thinks it's on a moving vessel is not a smart idea...I now feel nauseous.

- Jason doesn't like having strangers take him to the bathroom.

- When Jason is at Camp Carnival for an extended period of time, he will pee his pants if he is not taken to the bathroom.

- If you put a diaper on Jason while he is at Camp Carnival, it will be dry at the end of the day.

- If you try putting underwear back on him the next day, he will pee his pants again.

- Take more underwear than you think is necessary when traveling with a two year old, otherwise he will spend the last two days of his vacation in diapers.

- Camp Carnival is more fun after kids have made friends.

- After kids have made friends, they refuse to leave Camp Carnival.

- When kids refuse to leave Camp Carnival, they do not go to bed until 10:00pm.
- Kids who go to bed at 10:00pm are very sleepy the next day.
- Sleepy kids are cranky kids.

- Being out of our routine made me realize how ~~dependent~~ comfortable my kids have become with predictability. They love fun, new things, but until Type-A Mom and Dad have their bearings, excitement gets squelched. Which is not fun for anyone. Thankfully, it only takes this Mom and Dad a couple of days to settle down in a new environment.
- Traveling with 3700 strangers is a great way to catch a cold.
- Eating poorly is a great way to decrease your immune system so your body can't fight the germs from a cold.

- Taking a picture of the date written on a piece of paper seems ridiculous at the time, but is invaluable when sorting through vacation photos after a trip. (idea stolen from Becky Higgins)

- Even after all of the chaos that erupts from family vacations, the fun memories are what linger in my mind.
- Vacations are great, but sometimes getting back to life as usual is pretty nice, too.
- Tomorrow I have the enormous task of deprogramming my kids from vacation mode.
- There truly IS no place like home. As Ryan said tonight, "I walked into the house and took a big sniff and was so glad that it smelled like home again!"
- I can't wait to sleep in my own bed tonight.

And now...for the visual explanations of our experience:

This was the best. salsa. ever. Made {literally} by hand, right before our eyes.

Proof that I tried escargot!

ice cream makes everyone crazy

frog legs

I am hoping to get back into my routine tomorrow. I miss homeschooling. And my friends. And blogging. And vegetables. And proper exercise. And food that isn't drowning in butter and cheese. I do not miss laundry. Or driving in traffic. Or dishes. Or cleaning. And I only slightly miss cooking, but don't worry...that will be cured in a day or two!

Ahhh...it's good to be home.

Meal Plan 1/30/12

2012-01-29T19:24:00.002-07:00

Monday - Ravioli with Balsalmic Brown Butter Sauce
Tuesday - Salmon with quinoa and veggies
Wednesday - Tacos
Thursday - Spaghetti Carbonara
Friday - Beef Stir Fry
Saturday - Crock Pot Chicken Burritos
Sunday - Rice, Bean and Cheese Casserole

Ready to Pay It Forward

2012-01-18T21:50:00.001-07:00

I am glad to be back after my four-day, media-free Tastefully Simple Leadership Conference in San Antonio, TX. It was the longest I've been away from my whole family in...well, since I started a family!

I left on Thursday with the painful realization that I would not know a single soul. My roommate was a stranger, no one on my team was attending, I was really only going because I'd earned the trip for free. This all occurred to me as I packed last week. What was I thinking...going to a conference with 500 strangers?!?!

My sweet mom prayed with me on the way to the airport, but butterflies still crept into the pit of my stomach.

As I boarded the plane, God reminded me of the power of prayer. I passed several center seats, choosing to sit in between two ladies. (Less likelihood that they would smell stinky or attempt to flirt with me - can you tell I've had fun experiences when flying solo?) I sat down, got situated, and pulled out the book that our founder and CEO wrote. The gal on the aisle immediately asked my name.

"Katie Roose," I said, searching her face to see if she looked familiar. Her face lit up as she said, "I know exactly who you are! I'm Melody - you're on Jen's team, right?"

There were a total of three Phoenix-based consultants flying in to attend this 500++ attendee conference. And I sat by the ONE rep on my flight? Seriously God? You are hilariously ironic.

After two hours of chatting, Melody and I swapped cell numbers and she seemed willing to let me follow her around like a puppy. I was thankful (so thankful!) to know someone...a familiar face in a sea of people who had most likely attended these events in the past.

I didn't realize how thankful I was until I turned around at some point, later that afternoon, and Melody had vanished. She went back to get her water bottle in the room we'd just left and I found myself feeling awkward and alone. When she appeared again, I made sure she knew just how glad I was that we met on the plane!

We didn't hang out every moment of every day of the trip, but being able to text her to say, "Heading down to breakfast," was such a comforting feeling for my (suddenly) insecure personality. Especially since most of the people at the conference knew someone...or a dozen...or 50...

I left on Sunday afternoon promising myself that I'd make a conscious effort to look for people who might be traveling alone in the future. This conference pumped me up and I plan to attend many others, hoping to bring girls from my team with me, but I'm excited at the possibility of being someone's Melody next time. In fact, I plan to pray that God would lead me to just the right person (or people) who might be feeling lonely and insecure.

We get so caught up in ourselves and in our own comfort level, being around certain friends or getting to know certain people in social situations that too often the quiet ones get lost in the crowd.

Are you willing to step out and help bridge the gap for someone in your next social situation? Whether at school, church, work or at a neighborhood pot luck...keep your eyes (and heart) open for opportunities to make a new friend.

My lifelong friend, Michelle, drove out from Houston to visit me on Saturday. We ran into "George Jefferson" on the Riverwalk outside of the Hard Rock Cafe. Most of you, dear readers, are probably too young to even know his character from the 70s! But we were excited to have a momentary brush with fame...

Meal Plan 1/16/11

2012-01-15T19:20:00.001-07:00

Monday - Chicken Enchilada Quiche
Tuesday - {Crock Pot} Minestrone Soup
Wednesday - Turkey Tetrazzini
Thursday - leftovers
Friday - {Crock Pot} White Chicken Chili
Saturday - Chicken Parmesan

Bringing Back Q&A Wednesday with Kay-tay

2012-01-11T07:33:00.000-07:00

What ever happened to Q&A Wednesday? Somehow, I stopped answering questions from the comments this Fall. But it's time to bring it back.

So this post has two purposes:

1. Please feel free to leave a comment with a question you'd like me to answer.

2. If you would like to see more posts on a certain topic (it feels like I rarely post new recipes anymore) - leave a comment with that request, too.

I know I have a few new homeschoolers following my blog, yet there are some old faithful readers who couldn't care less about that piece of my life. I guess I've just been wondering what you'd like to read about.

Crafts?

Organization?

Cooking?

Goals?

Parenting ideas?

My boring daily life...? (that was for you, Mom)

Please take a minute and leave a comment with your thoughts. Thanks!

Clothes, Movies, Goals and One Night Stands

2012-01-09T21:01:00.004-07:00

Did my title get your attention? This post is a hodge podge of what's swimming around in my head tonight, and I'm writing it so I can procrastinate doing something that I really need to do but need another excuse to avoid. Plus, I haven't had a good brain dump in a while, so here goes...

First and foremost, I'm preparing for my first business trip with Tastefully Simple this week. It's a $1000+ leadership conference that I earned for free, plus some extra money to cover my airfare. The whole trip will cost me $12 AND I get to see one of my BFFs during our free afternoon on Saturday. Yay!

I haven't been on a business trip in over a decade. Well, unless you count doing vendor events with my mom's company. I digress...I scoured my closet tonight to see what I'll pack to wear and oy. It was slim pickin's! My wardrobe really is meek. And pathetic. I will say that (for some reason) I still have the dress that I wore to my wedding rehearsal nearly 12 years ago and I tried it on tonight and it looked great. Gotta love those classic Ann Taylor pieces! Of course, I have no shoes to match, but I'll remedy that later this week. I will also be purchasing some Spanx to help hold in my bits and pieces for another outfit I picked out. And some new jeans, since my trusty pair of Lucky Big Stars are fraying terribly at the bottom.

Hmmm, this trip is costing more than I thought...

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Speaking of clothes, Victoria's Secret stopped carrying my bra. My "find the perfect bra" goal on my 101 in 1001 list? Yeah, THAT BRA. I am so frustrated with them. The good news is that I bought three over the course of more than a year, so hopefully those will last me a while. Because seriously...I searched for that dumb bra for years. Grrrr.

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Don't you wish they'd sell the t.v. version of movies? I recorded and watched the ABC Family version of Love Actually over the holidays and it was delightful. They completely cut out the porn stand-in couple, if you were wondering. The whole thing was lovely and hilarious and refreshing. Except for the British guy who flew to the states and allowed the movie's Director to portray American girls as complete bimbos. But whatever.

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Speaking of movies, Mike and I rented Crazy, Stupid Love this weekend and I loved it! I mean, all things considered. One-night stands and all, there's just something about a bad boy going soft and getting whipped by a cute little red head. And WOW, Ryan Gossling sure got himself into shape for that one, didn't he? I'm guessing he had 9% body fat, if that. Yowza.

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Speaking of one night stands, Mike and I saw an ad on a bus the other day that said, "Wanted: One Night Stand." Our naive little eyes were appalled, of course, until we got closer and realized it was an ad for a local consignment store. Instead of THAT kind of one night stand, it was "Wanted...1 nightstand." Clever, huh? Got our attention, that's for sure.

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I got a Mac and I'm so excited. It's a MacBook Pro and I love it. Love. Except that I'm not completely converted over from my PC because I'm not as fast on Pages or Numbers as I am in Word and Excel. And lets be honest...I don't have a ton of spare time to tinker around these days. Maybe I'll play around with it during my business trip. Considering the fact that I won't know a single soul there.

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Speaking of love: I am loving homeschooling. This afternoon, Ryan picked Kaylin up from the bus stop and the kids played at the nearby park for a while with some friends. Instead of barking at them to come home so we could trudge through homework, they got to play for more than two hours without a care in the world. Kaylin didn't have any homework, but even if she had, we could have done it in the morning while Ryan was schooling. I am love-love-LOVING this freedom in the afternoons.

Over the past 5 weeks, we've been primarily focusing on reading, writing and arithmetic, but last week, we incorporated in some ancient history and the kids are really into it. They do a related coloring page while I read aloud, then we do the review questions together, look at a map of the area we're discussing, then do an additional project from the activity book if there's time. We're all learning so much: Nomads, Egyptians and hyroglyphs, oh my!

Then last night, I began reading them Little House in the Big Woods from the Little House on the Prairie series. Ryan is so into it already that he begs me not to stop reading. I put Jason in his crib and the big kids lay on Ryan's bunks while I read before bedtime. It's a great setup and they're a captive audience. Even Jason's already learning not to be disruptive. So far, so good!

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Last week, a friend and I took our kids to the Pirate Exhibit at the Arizona Science Center. I was a little underwhelmed by the exhibit, personally, especially for the cost. Hmmm...I take that back. I guess I actually enjoyed it, but the fact that it was lots of reading and little that they could touch meant that the little ones weren't as captivated. Glad we went, wouldn't go again.

The kids were even all pirated out for the day. We split two costumes and three bandannas between five kids. Not bad, huh? How cute are these scurvy dogs?

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Mike and I tried to hike Camelback Mountain yesterday, despite the fact that my 1001 days ended 105 days ago. The conditions were nearly perfect. Most importantly, we had childcare: the kids had a sleepover with my mom. The weather wasn't too hot and wasn't too cold. I'm not pregnant. (that took up a large chunk of my 1001 days!) I've been to the gym at least three times in the last month. (not in the best shape, but I figured I wouldn't die)

Well. We couldn't find a parking space for ANYTHING. Since when do cars wait in line to get a parking space to exercise?!?!? We even drove slowly behind people, hoping they were done hiking and on their way to their cars. So disappointing. With our tails between our legs, we then drove over to another popular mountain, Squaw Peak, and found one lonely parking space just sitting there, waiting for us.

We huffed and puffed up the mountain, even passing some hikers. (ahem...most were very old or very young, like FIVE years old, but it made me feel better that I wasn't the slowest one on the mountain) I forgot how steep this dumb thing is! It was like climbing stairs for 45 minutes. My legs were Jell-O when we got to the top and I was concerned that I was too shaky to make it down safely. Thank goodness for gravity, because I ended up bending my leg and practically falling down the rock-formed stairs, somehow avoiding stumbling to my death. But seriously, I won't be hiking Squaw Peak for a while. And to think...Mike and his boss used to jog that twice a week in our days before kids! He didn't remember ever being in that good of shape.

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Last thought: during our date night Saturday, I talked Mike into committing to his own version of the 12 Goals for 2012. He's not a goals person, so this was HUGE. Things that made his list are: no coffee for a month, arrive early to work every day for a month, grill every weekend (YAY for me not having to cook Saturday or Sunday - this was actually his idea), plus lots of fitness goals and wake up early/go to bed early goals. I'm so proud of him! I might have to rearrange a few of my months to be in line with his months, but that's okay. He's even on board with July's "no t.v. except 2 hours/week" goal. Can't wait for that one...we waste so much time on pointless entertainment. I blame the t.v. for why I don't read. Flipping on the t.v. and demanding that it entertain me with no effort on my part...hopefully I'll pick up a book or two during the month of July.

Thanks for hanging with me during my rambles. I hope you're having a great week!

Meal Plan 1/9/12

2012-01-08T16:09:00.003-07:00

Monday - {Vegetarian} Southwestern Quinoa Casserole
Tuesday - Combo of this and this recipe for Turkey Noodle Soup
Wednesday - Bowties with Broccoli & Sausage
Thursday - Pesto Halibut, green beans and Olive Oil Bread
Friday - Mike on his own with the kids
Saturday - Leftovers
Sunday - Vegetable Penne with Pesto

12 Habits for Twenty-12

2012-01-06T07:46:00.000-07:00

I've sort of missed my 101 Goals in 1001 Days list since it expired in September. I like having goals to work toward and I haven't quite figured out what a good next-step would be after tackling that whopper. Certainly not another 101 in 1001 list...yet...

Then I stumbled across the idea of creating 12 new habits this year. I'm not so much into resolutions, but I'm loving this one-per-month idea!

So here's my list. Much better than resolutions! More attainable. Time sensitive. Focusing on one at a time for 30 days, which is how long it takes to make a habit. Love. It.

January - End the month at the same weight (or less, which is unlikely) as I am today.*

February - Get up early each day.

March - No Facebook for the entire month.

April - Meal plan, including one meatless recipe and one new recipe each week.

May - Stop eating each meal when I'm satisfied, not when I'm "full."

June - Compliment Mike and the kids at least once each day.

July - Keep the t.v. off for all but 2 hours a week.**

August - Create a homeschool schedule for the new "school year" and stick to it each day.

September - Read the Bible daily. No exceptions.

October - Workout five times per week.

November - No eating after 8pm.

December - Take virtually the whole month off from work. I'm allowed to have one party (to fulfill my quota) and spend no more than one hour a week on follow up.

* This is NOT a number I am proud of, by the way. Not to mention that I've lost virtually all muscle tone in my body because I'm out of the habit of working out and I have no self control around sugar! This is a huge goal for January since I'm going on a business trip next week for a company that sells FOOD, then we're going on a week-long cruise later this month. I know it will be hard to lose weight this month, so my goal is to not GAIN weight. Not one. single. pound.

** July is before college football starts, so this just might be possible...for ALL of us. I'd better inform Mike of this one, since I included him without asking him!

New Year, Fresh Perspective. Time to Get Organized.

2012-01-02T14:19:00.024-07:00

On New Year's Day, Mike's parents took our kids to the zoo. With the house all to ourselves, Mike spent an unhealthy amount of time figuring out iTunes while I tackled some organizational hot spots in our school room.

My first area of concern was all of our new (amazing) educational toys and games that the kids got for Christmas. They were everywhere; in the way and getting lost.

I pulled out a bunch of plastic bins, emptied their contents, and reorganized them to hold an assortment of distractions for Jason that I could rotate each day. I now have five bins full of toys, puzzles and books, for Monday through Friday, to keep Jason occupied while we do schoolwork. (PS - I have wanted to do this since Ryan was little, but never got around to it. I've always loved this bin-of-the-day concept!)

The two year old attention span is really short, so I've also decided to set the timer for 15 minutes and rotate what he's playing with to avoid boredom and mischief. I get so into teaching the big kids that I don't realize how much time passes, rarely rewarding Jason for keeping himself entertained. Poor little man!

After that, I revised our school schedule for January and prepped our school work for this week. It hit me today that I'm traveling three times in the next six weeks, so I really wanted to take advantage of the free time to wrap my head around our coursework, before I get overwhelmed with packing and planning for my trips.

Next, I sat down and wrote an inventory of our outside toys and outside play ideas. The weather has been beautiful this past week and it occurred to me that I might want to set up an outside toy rotation schedule, too. The kids overlook so many fun ideas, simply because they're readily available all the time. Taking them out of sight for a period of time might increase their appeal. It sounds good in my head...we'll see if it works!

I remember our old pre-school had a calendar in the storage shed of which toys and games were to be pulled out each week, to keep things fresh for the kids. So I did what I do best: I ~~stole~~ borrowed their genius idea. This might sound over the top, but I know myself. My intentions are good, but in the moment, if I'm up to my elbows in dinner prep, finding all of the pieces for the ring toss game doesn't occur to me...and I direct the kids to the swingset or their bikes. Again.

While I was in the "writing down ideas" mood, I filled out some note cards to put in our Bored Box. I've slacked off on my whole "no t.v." bandwagon over the last several months and I'm ready to pull the plug again. Granted, the kids prefer PBS shows like Curious George and Cat in the Hat, which I love because they tend to be more wholesome and educational, but I'd much rather they get back in the habit of playing creatively together instead of asking to watch a t.v. show.

(Some of the ideas I added to the bored box are: write/act out a play, have a talent show, make an obstacle course, play grocery store, do a treasure hunt and have a puppet show.)

The other day, I suggested that the kids do a play with our neighbor and this is the script I found outside...

I love when they use their imaginations. I'll be making the "no t.v." announcement this week. I'm sure I'll miss the electronic babysitter for that hour or so each day, but I'll have to adjust!

Meal Plan 1/2/12

2012-01-02T08:00:00.003-07:00

I am so ready to get back into meal planning! So far, I'm off to a good start this year...!

Monday - Chicken on the grill and salad.
Tuesday - {Healthy} Cream of Potato Soup with Whole Wheat Bread
Wednesday - Beef Stir Fry
Thursday - Salmon with Balsalmic Quinoa Salad
Friday - Ravioli with Balsalmic Brown Butter Sauce
Saturday - Spaghetti and meatballs
Sunday - Turkey Pot Pie

One Single Goal for 2012

2012-01-01T21:19:00.000-07:00

photo credit

I have one goal for this year. Sure, I'd like to lose some weight, workout more consistently, get up earlier in the morning, master my homeschooling schedule, start meal planning again, finish some projects around the house, all of that fun stuff. But none of those achievements describe my New Year's resolution.

This weekend, I had a light bulb moment as we were putting away Christmas decorations. An epiphany. Hmmm, that sounds too pretty...it felt like a slap-in-the-face kind of an awakening, really.

To sum it up, I don't like the way I speak to my family. Not all of the time; mostly when I'm overwhelmed. I'm too short with my tone, too loud with my requests, too snappy with my words, too annoyed at poor decisions (ahem...Jason sneaking lollipops).

I caught myself in the act on Saturday and immediately felt horrible.

The kicker was that no one called me on it. Sure, maybe they were being gracious (specifically Mike), but I'm wondering if they're just used to Mommy barking when things aren't done when/how/where I want them to be...? I felt so ugly in that moment and I'm so glad I feel this conviction.

So that's it. I will purpose, every day, several times throughout the day, to focus my attention on my words, my tone, my motives and my heart attitude. I am committing this goal to prayer and I am fully prepared to have my patience tested. (the mere thought of that is painful)

I hope that this time next year...next MONTH...I am consistently speaking to my husband and kids like they are the most important people on Earth.

Because they are.

Happy NOON Year!

2011-12-30T20:44:00.001-07:00

Being that our kids go to bed between 7-8pm, staying up until midnight on New Year's Eve is still a few years away. BUT we've adapted a tradition of celebrating "Happy Noon Year" at noon with the kids.

We count down to 12:00 noon, go outside with blowers and sparklers, toast sparkling cider and celebrate in the backyard. It's a quick, fun celebration for the kids and Mike and I enjoy their anticipation.

Last year we commemorated the event with a family picture that is the cover of our Project 365 Picture-a-Day digital album for 2011. Let's see if I can remember to do that tomorrow!

(pics from 2010)

Picking up the pieces of my day. Literally.

2011-12-27T20:25:00.003-07:00

This post was supposed to be very different...but my day went downhill as I was typing, so I went with it. Sorry for all of the variation in present vs. past tense...I wrote this at various points in the evening.

6:30am - Woke up tired, but in a good mood. Caught up on some things on the computer before getting Jason out of bed.
7am - Put in a load of laundry.
7:45am - Put laundry into the dryer and notice that there is stuff piled on top of stuff on the laundry room counter. Realize there is no where to put folded laundry.
8:30am - Attempt to fold laundry, putting piles of clean clothes on every flat surface possible.
9am - Have a mini meltdown because of all of the clutter. Everywhere. Convince kids to help put everything back in its place so Mommy doesn't go ballistic. Take a new Christmas toy out of its package to keep Jason captivated while we tidy up.
9:30am - Everyone's sick of frantically putting things away. We stop to begin our school day. (I'm not taking a regular break like the schools because we just started and I don't want us to lose momentum.)
10:30am - Jason is not staying occupied while we learn, so I have Ryan put on a Bubble Guppies show for him downstairs.
11:00am - Come downstairs to find the contents of our pantry strung all over the family room.
11:01am - Left a message on Mike's phone asking him to make it his #1 priority to put a lock on the pantry. For my sanity. And the safety of our two year old.
11:30am - Took a break from school and attempted to put together Kaylin's new Color Me Playhouse from Christmas for the kids to color. Failed miserably.
12:00pm - Put Jason to bed and sent everyone for a quiet time. Ahhh...sweet silence...!
1:45pm - With Jason asleep, suggest to Ryan that we organize his room. Ryan pulled out absolutely everything that's not nailed down. The floor is a disaster within 3 minutes. Make signs for "Put away in room," "Put away elsewhere in the house," "Keepsakes," and "Trash."
2:00pm - Explain to Ryan that he can't keep everything. After some back and forth, he gets the idea and agrees to throw out lots of silly stuff. We negotiate that he must limit his keepsakes to one particular box and he can keep whatever will fit inside.
2:30pm - Kaylin comes out of her room from quiet time asking if we can do her room next.
3:00pm - Take two trash bags full of junk out of Ryan's room and put away the final items. His room is spotless.
3:05pm - The doorbell rings and the kids go outside to play with the neighbor. She teaches them the words to "It's a Barbie World," complete with hand motions that a 4th grade boy taught her after school. I never realized that 2nd line was "My boobs are plastic...it's fantastic." Awesome.
3:45pm - Jason tries sneaking a "lala-pop" from the glass dessert jar in the pantry. He drops it and it shatters into four million pieces. Double awesome.

4:00pm - Sweep, vacuum and mop the area thoroughly so that I don't step on a shard and limp around the house like I've been doing for the past week after dropping the microwave plate on the kitchen tile. Jason is summoned to the playroom so I can regain my composure.

4:15pm - Feeling hungry (or maybe I wanted to stress eat...whatever...) but was too lazy to make something healthy. Heat up stuffing. With gravy. Proceed to eat ALL of the remaining stuffing in the fridge.
4:20pm - Feel nauseous.
4:30pm - Put Jason's shoes on to play outside. Clearly this kid needs to release some energy and I need him to be in a wide open space where he can't destroy anything.
4:40pm - The big kids beg me to go door to door, singing the Barbie song. With the hand motions. I declined their request, letting them know that rubbing their chests and singing about boobs is inappropriate. They asked to sing Jingle Bells door to door. I declined their idea to go post-Christmas caroling, too.
5:00pm - Jason accidentally kicked over my beloved K-State rock. It splits in half and I almost cry. Not awesome.

5:10pm - Called Mike to tell him that I was NOT going to be in a good mood when he got home from work. He sounded thrilled.
5:30pm - Poured my first glass of Skinnygirl White Cranberry Cosmo. It went down really, really easily.
5:45pm - Realized I cut my finger on a piece of glass while cleaning up the dessert jar.
5:48pm - Poured my second glass of Skinnygirl White Cranberry Cosmo.
5:50pm - Reheated leftovers for dinner. I was in no position to cook.
5:55pm - A friend came over to borrow a stick of butter. I let her finish my drink.
5:59pm - Jason threw his fork and flipped his dinner plate, spilling it all over his high chair.
6:00pm - Poured my third glass of Skinnygirl White Cranberry Cosmo.
6:10pm - Wondered where Mike was? He's unusually late from work. Why wouldn't he want to come home to this madhouse? He must be hiding. Smart man.
6:35pm - Mike walked in the door from work. With flowers. He's smarter than I thought. I kind of hoped he was at Lowe's or Home Depot picking up a lock for the pantry. But flowers are better.
6:40pm - Opened the mail while Mike ate dinner. The kids were so quiet upstairs...I should have been suspicious, but I was too tipsy to care. Plus, Christmas cards make me happy.
7:05pm - Heard Kaylin yell, "Mo-om! Jason's got the flash cards!" I didn't budge.

7:10pm - Went upstairs to find ALL of the flash cards sprinkled across the school room. 52 card pick up isn't such a big deal, but Jason had separated the color and shape cards, phonics cards, alphabet cards, sight word cards AND numbers cards...mixing them all together. This is what I get for mentally checking out before bedtime...
7:25pm - Put Jason in bed. Then clipped Ryan's finger nails, which is a big deal because he was going through a phase of biting them to the nub. I promised that if they got long enough for me to have to clip them, he could sleep with his blanket that night. This is the second time I've had to clip them. He is thrilled.
7:45pm - Mike reads to Kaylin while I read to Ryan. I. am. exhausted.
8:20pm - All kids in bed. This post was supposed to be a detailed account of how our organizing adventure went this afternoon. Then the day went downhill and I felt the need to document it. Never a dull moment around here.
8:24pm - Hit "Publish Post" on this drawn out explanation of my day and went to watch something useless on t.v.

Our 25 Days of Christmas {in pictures}

2011-12-26T17:00:00.000-07:00

Ice Cream Cone Christmas Tree craft

Craft Day with cookies and milk at a local restaurant

Cookie baking day

Lunch with Santa

Snow Day

Picking an Angel Tree kid and shopping for them

Failed Gingerbread house...again! We just frosted and decorated the walls.

Storytime with Curious George

Take the kids shopping for each other (Ryan checked out Hello Kitty central at Claire's)

(Kaylin LOVED wrapping Ryan's gift...it's covered in multiple papers, ribbons and bows)

(This was the gift Ryan chose for Kaylin...be still my heart!)

Firepit in the backyard, roasting marshmallows

Drive around in PJs looking at Christmas lights...drinking cocoa

Merry Christmas to all...!

2011-12-24T10:08:00.003-07:00

I just wanted to take a moment to wish you a very Merry Christmas. Thank you for taking time out of your busy life to read my ramblings every now and then. It still blows my mind that anyone cares about what I have to say.

Now get off the computer and go spend time with your family!!! :)

Caramel Pecan French Toast Casserole

2011-12-23T08:48:00.013-07:00

I modified this recipe to create the delicious masterpiece below. It's the perfect Christmas or New Year's Day breakfast because it can sit in the fridge overnight, then get popped in the oven in the morning, without any thought.

Ingredients

1 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup butter
2 tablespoons light corn syrup
1 cup chopped pecans
1 loaf French bread, sliced 1 inch thick
8 eggs, beaten
1 cup milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 tablespoon granulated sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg

Instructions

In a medium saucepan, stir together brown sugar, butter, and corn syrup. Heat and stir until the butter melts and the brown sugar dissolves. Pour into a rectangular 3-quart baking dish. Sprinkle with half the pecans.
Arrange the bread slices in a single layer in the baking dish. Sprinkle with remaining pecans.
In a medium bowl, stir together eggs, milk, and vanilla extract. Pour slowly over bread. Press lightly with the back of a large spoon to moisten all bread.
Stir together granulated sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg; sprinkle over bread. Cover and chill in refrigerator overnight.
Bake, uncovered, in a 350 degree oven for 30-40 minutes or until lightly browned. Let stand ten minutes.
To serve, remove individual servings with a wide spatula and invert onto each plate.

Gift-Opening Pep-Talk

2011-12-22T13:35:00.001-07:00

Before all of our birthday and Christmas celebrations, I try to remember to have a "pep talk" with my kids about opening cards and gifts. I ask them to show me their reaction if they open a gift that they don't want, don't like, didn't ask for, is the wrong size/color/shape/quantity, even gifts that they DO want. With gifts they love, we practice showing appreciation and putting it aside without having a fit about taking it out of the package or playing with it immediately.

With gifts they aren't as excited about, I remind the kids not to lie and say, "I love it!" but instead, we discuss other phrases they could say to show gratitude to the gift giver. Regardless of whether they like the gift or not, I want my kids to be grateful. Not only outwardly, but on the inside, as well. Finding something that they like about the present will help them see the "glass half full" in other situations.

Take time in the next couple of days to have a chat with your kids. Make it a family rule that everyone takes turns opening gifts. The gift-giver will feel like their present actually matters in the sea of toys and games!

I will never forget a Christmas a while back when our finances were very tight. (well, one of the years...) I put my foot down and insisted that I buy something small for each of my cousins' children. I shopped and shopped and found amazing tokens of my love, that were within our budget, but things that I thought each kid would really like.

On Christmas Eve, everyone began opening each others gifts and it became a paper-flying, bow-flinging, free-for-all. I waited for each child to find my gift, then watched in horror as they were dismissed and tossed aside like a dirty sock. Granted, my gifts were up against Grandma's big "wow" gifts, but still! I vowed to never let that happen under my roof. Not to mention that it was the last year I bought presents for my extended family.

I'll admit: I can't control what happens in the excitement of the moment. But I can attempt to set them up for success by preparing my greedy little heathens to slow down and properly show appreciation!

The Polar Express is coming. To our house. Tonight.

2011-12-18T23:10:00.002-07:00

During dinner tonight, Ryan made a very exciting announcement:

Ryan: "When we were playing outside this afternoon, we heard a train horn. And Morgan said it was probably The Polar Express. So when it stops at our house tonight...can we get on it?"
Mike: "Sure."
Me: "Absolutely! If The Polar Express comes to our house tonight, you may absoLUTEly get on it."

(Ryan was so relieved that we agreed...then the excitement set in. The horn, by the way, is the car horn of a man in the neighborhood who loves honking it as he drives around. It sounds exactly like a train. We had no idea what it was until he drove by our house one day.)

Ryan: "So I need to stay up really late to wait for The Polar Express. Is that fine?"
Me: "Actually, if you remember from the movie, the boy was asleep when it pulled up to his house."
Ryan: "Oh YEAH. And his whole room shook and that's what woke him up."
Me: "Exactly."
Mike: "In fact, if you're awake, it won't come. You HAVE TO go to sleep."
Kaylin: "Then we should leave out our robe and slippers. So they're easier to grab before we go out the front door."
Me: "Good thinking!"

(at this point, the kids were so excited that they could hardly sit still in their seats, let alone eat their dinner)

Kaylin: "Can Jason come?"
Me: "No, he's too young. Plus, he probably wouldn't listen and obey the conductor, so we'll keep him at home with us."
Kaylin: "Okay. I wonder if they'll have cocoa...?"
Ryan: "Of course they'll have cocoa! Remember the 'Hot! Hot!' song from the movie? We'll get cocoa...and probably cookies...and we'll take the train all the way up to the North Pole to meet the REAL Santa Claus."
Kaylin: "Yay!"
Ryan: "And I bet I'LL get the first gift of Christmas."
Kaylin: "I'll get the second gift."

(while getting ready for bed, I overheard Ryan in his room)

Ryan: "Jason...now you have to be a very good boy for Mommy and Daddy. Ryan is going on The Polar Express tonight and you need to be very, very good while I'm gone. Okay?"
Jason: "Okay, Ry-yun."
Kaylin: "OH NO! I don't have any slippers!!! Will they let me on the train?!!?"
Ryan: "Yes, but you have to wear something. It can't be flip flops, though. Those aren't allowed."
Kaylin: "Let's leave everything out in the hallway."
Ryan: "MOM!? Can we do a practice run? Here. You be the train. Make a train sound and we'll run out of our bedrooms and see if we can get our robe and slippers on in 5 seconds."

(Dry run ensued...turns out 5 seconds was too short. We decided 20 seconds was plenty of time.)

Ryan: "Oh GREAT, Mom. I just cleaned up my room and," (tears filled his eyes...I kid you not) "...when the whole house shakes, it's going to mess it all up!"
Me: "Don't worry, buddy. I'll help you clean it up again."
Kaylin: "I'm kind of scared."
Mike: "You don't have to go if you don't want to, honey."
Me: "Remember the little boy, Billy, who almost didn't get on The Polar Express? The conductor was fine with it...he wasn't mad at all."
Ryan: "But I'll be there, Kaylin, so you'll be fine."
Kaylin: "Okay. I'll just decide when it gets here."
Ryan: "Mom, will the ticket just appear in my pocket?"
Me: "I have no idea...you'll have to tell me in the morning."

(Teeth brushed, robe and slippers moved around a few more times...taken OFF of the rail knob so the pocket won't rip, like in the movie.)

Me: "Ryan, can I talk to you for a second?"
Ryan: "Sure."
Me: "I want you to be prepared for the fact that The Polar Express may or may not come tonight. Are you prepared if it DOES come?"
Ryan: "Yeah...we have all of our stuff ready to go."
Me: "Great. But what if it doesn't come? Will you be mad tomorrow?"
Ryan: (looking down) "No."
Me: "Will you be disappointed?"
Ryan: "Yeah."
Me: "I just want you to be prepared both situations. The train may come. Or it may not. Are you okay either way?"
Ryan: "Yeah, I guess."
Me: "Alright, buddy. If you do go tonight, remember to be safe and have fun. Be a good example to the other kids and make lots of memories, okay?"
Ryan: (blushing) "Okay."

(same conversation with Kaylin)

Mike: "Time for bed, guys."
Kaylin: "Daddy, will you come with us?"
Mike: "No, honey. Remember in the movie? The parents slept through the whole thing."
Kaylin: "Oh. Okay. G'night."

I couldn't make this up if I tried.

We have never had a conversation like this in our house before. Mike and I generally aren't the parents who go along with the fairy tale. But tonight? Both of us were in the mood to roll with it.

My kids love the magic behind Christmas. And to think that I considered telling Ryan about Santa this year...? I would have crushed him to the core. He's already frustrated that I don't do The Elf on the Shelf. Oh yes, I told him he's not real. Don't worry...he knows to keep the secret. But his friends are so convinced that he actually asked me if I'd move our elf around into fun, new places every morning, "...just like Jake and Joe and Lexi's moms do..." (For a reminder about why we chose not to do The Elf, see this post from last year...I still laugh every time I think about it.)

He's so not ready for the truth. If Jack Nicholson were here, he'd tell me that Ryan can't handle the truth. This kid is going to believe long after it's normal and healthy for a child to believe.

Just like his mama did.

Priorities, Priorities...

2011-12-16T21:32:00.000-07:00

For those who follow my {terribly neglected} Picture of the Day blog, I have finally caught up on the FIVE weeks I was behind. It was on my to-do list every week, I just hadn't gotten around to journalling about the pictures.

My mom sent me an email the other day, with "Remember me?" in the subject line. This was the email:

Hi Katie,

Remember me? I’m your POD blog.

Yea, it’s been a long while since we’ve seen each other. I know how busy you are, too busy to miss me for sure. But I just wanted you to know that I sure miss you!

Hugs always,
http://katiespod.blogspot.com/

So go ahead, Mom...take a gander. It's all up to date!

Apparently, I can't do it all...?

2011-12-12T14:46:00.001-07:00

Jason feeding me grapes last month...back when I was making good choices!

I'm a pretty efficient person. I'm intentional about most everything I do (hence the blog name) whether it's errands, playing with my kids or my own downtime...I plan what I'll do and when based on how many little people are unconscious in my house at any given time.

But I have to say that homeschooling has thrown a monkey wrench into my daily rhythm. Homeschooling itself is amazing. I'm really thrilled with how much the kids and I enjoy it! I knew this undertaking would consume lots of time, so I put my business on hold for the month of December while we all adjusted. However, it seems that taking on such a huge task means that something has to give in another area.

And that area has been me. Physically.

My sleep is precious to me, so that's not a problem. (a sleepy mom is an impatient mom in our house) My health, however, has taken the back seat during this transition. And by backseat, I really mean TRUNK. Or maybe even the car behind me.

Not only have I not made the gym a priority, but my food choices have been horrendous! Like it wasn't bad enough that we're knee-deep in the baking and party-going season...

I could blame it on the fact that Mike was traveling for work most of the past two weeks. I was barely able to keep my head above water with a pleasant attitude, so cooking healthy meals was not a priority. Pizza, pasta, salty quick-fixes, carbs, carbs, carbs. And snacks? Whatever I could grab at the time...Christmas cookies have been readily available. I haven't been eating my daily salad for lunch and certainly haven't been making eggs for breakfast. Eating out has increased as time has decreased. And don't get me started on how many liquid calories I've consumed socially in the last month.

I'm positive I would faint if I sat down and calculated my daily calorie intake.

My body is begging to exercise. The jiggle when I wiggle disgusts me! I'm praying that the 4 lbs I've gained in the past two weeks is all water weight, but I know better.

Successfully homeschooling? Check.
Tidy house? Check.
To-do list sustained? Check.
Errands run? Check.
Cookies baked? Check.
Emails under control? Check.
Christmas cards sent? Check.
Christmas gifts purchased? Check.
Gifts wrapped? Mostly, so check.
Happy kids? Check.
Happy mom? Check.
Happy dad? Check.

But do my jeans fit? Um, notsomuch. I walk around almost every day in my gym clothes, trying to find the time to load everyone in the car and go. But it just hasn't happened. So I eat a handful of Christmas cookies instead. Then climb into bed for my sugar coma when Kaylin heads off to Kindergarten, Jason naps and Ryan reads. I could do a workout video, but a nap sounds so much more refreshing.

I have GOT to get this under control, and it stinks that I'm taking on this challenge before the New Year! But if I wait, I'll be in so much more trouble.

(*sigh*)

Instead of complaining, I need some action items.
1. Meal plan...HEALTHY meals.
2. Portion control.
3. One Christmas cookie is fine. Ten is not.
4. Workout 4-5 times per week. Schedule gym time, but accept that I must workout during naptime, too.
5. Increase water intake, decrease alcohol intake.
6. Stop baking.
7. Do. Not. Compromise. The short term satisfaction isn't worth the long term ramifications.

Okay, I'm feeling better already. Kind of. So much easier said than done. Let's see if I can walk the talk!

The Goal is Peace and Fun

2011-12-09T07:54:00.001-07:00

Things have been a bit crazy around here lately. Not only have I turned our house upside down with the decision to homeschool Ryan, but Mike's been out of town the better part of the last two weeks training for his new job. Life has felt anything but normal!

I've been managing pretty well...sticking to a loose new school schedule, sneaking to the gym now and then, keeping the house in order, attempting to stay ahead of the endless dishes and laundry, staying on top of our 25 Days of Christmas activities (I'm a glutton for punishment)...primarily all on my own, since Mike has been working 12 hour days in Sacramento. Oh, and did I mention that my free time is practically non-existent anymore? The precious 3-hours that Jason naps used to be my time to recharge, but more than half of that is now dedicated to teaching Ryan. Not complaining, it's just a fact and it comes with the territory.

All of this to say that we've been plugging along just fine, even with all of the major changes. Except one tiny little detail that is driving me insane: the kids have not been getting along as harmoniously as I'd expected. Granted, it's not going to be completely like Christmas and summer breaks, where everyone is home and playing and they remember why they're best friends...Kaylin is still going to school and absorbing the horrific attitudes of her classmates. But I have to admit that I never thought she was the bigger part of the problem in their relationship. I was wrong. You know the phrase, "When mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy?" Well apparently, when Kaylin ain't happy, Ryan's ain't allowed to be happy.

I'm guessing that the extra dose of sassy-ness is due to Ryan intruding on her morning routine with Mom. She was the big helper. She was the big sister. She wasn't upstaged by someone bigger and more able to do this or that. I tried to be gracious at first, but the bickering has gotten out of control.

On a homeschooling mom blog post I read recently, the writer explained that whatever they do, wherever they go, she always reminds her family: "The goal is peace and fun." How simple is that? I tucked that into my memory at the time, and decided to pull it out the other day.

The big kids weren't even out of the their PJs before the first of the bickering began. I called them together and announced that our new goal each day will be to strive for peace and to have fun. We discussed that "peace" means getting along and not fighting.

I held my breath and thought, "This had better work!"

Throughout the day when Kaylin jumped into Ryan's seat at breakfast and Ryan responded with, "Heeyyy!" or when Ryan grabbed his stolen toy from Jason's hand and Jason screamed, or when Kaylin pouted over not getting her favorite seat in the van, I said, "What is the goal?" Heads would bow and they'd mumble, "...peace and fun..." I'd ask, "Is everyone having fun?" Of course, they said, "No..." "Is there peace right now?" "No..." "Then what needs to change to make that happen? What can you be doing differently?" And they proceeded to figure it out.

The day wasn't perfect, but MAN was it a ton better than the rest of the week has been! There were a couple of times when someone was grumpy and was excused to their room until they could show me a happy heart. (basically, they need to smile sincerely) But for the most part, it was a very peaceful, FUN day!

I've decided to take a break from the homeschooling schedule and let the kids have tons more free time together in the morning. They need to re-learn how to play together, re-learn how to cooperate and teach Jason how to join in on the fun. I love the flexibility I have to make this my priority right now!

Sad Before Mad

2011-12-07T21:25:00.000-07:00

I got this article in my email the other day and it slapped me across the face. I've been unusually angry with the kids lately (not consistently, but seemingly random bursts, as described below) and the situation described really hit home. I've found myself swallowing my frustration/sadness with behavior issues, knowing that everyone is adjusting to our new homeschooling routine. Then, out of no where, I'll blow up at someone about something really insignificant. I'm sure I'm the only one with this issue...this article was written just for me, right?

Often parents have a poor repertoire of discipline techniques so they do what comes naturally—they use anger as a consequence. Anger becomes the punishment that children learn to fear and the result is distance in relationships. Parents want to express disapproval for misbehavior and anger becomes the vehicle for showing it.

Imagine this scenario: You're making dinner and your six-year-old daughter, Amy, comes into the room complaining that she’s hungry. You tell her that you're making dinner and that she needs to wait. She persists and complains that she hasn't eaten all day. You remind her that she had a snack a few hours ago and then encourage her to leave the room. Instead of leaving, she begins to whine, "I’m starving." Finally you sigh and offer her a banana or an apple. "I don’t like bananas! I don’t want an apple!" Okay, you give in. You offer her some milk and a cookie. Amy is so excited she jumps up…and knocks over the milk! You’ve had it! That was the last straw. Now you're really angry and yell, "What's the matter with you? Now look what you've done!!"

Think a minute. What caused you to lose control? Was it the spilled milk, or was it the fifteen minutes of whining and complaining? If we wait until we become angry to discipline, then we end up responding like a time bomb. Our children can never be sure when we’ll explode.

In this situation, Mom needed to take action earlier. "Amy, it makes me sad that you keep asking after I said No. You need to go play in your room until I call you for dinner."

In honor-based parenting, anger and its accompanying distance are not appropriate consequences. Instead, parents learn to reflect sorrow. Some parents may feel like hypocrites because they don't feel sad, they feel mad. But it doesn't take long for a parent to recognize that the sorrow is there. It's just masked by the anger. If you peel away the anger you will genuinely feel sad that your child is acting out or choosing to disobey. You see that the misbehavior will lead to an unhappy and unsuccessful life. Reflecting sadness is much more beneficial to the child and to the relationship.

Try it; you may be surprised. Children often open up in response to sadness and you may end up with a productive conversation. Sadness opens relationships; anger shuts them down. It may take some practice, and self-control, but your relationships with your kids will benefit in the end.
What are some ways you've been able to reflect sorrow to connect with your child's heart? Click here to tell us about it.

This idea is honor-based parenting skill #2 from Chapter 6 in the book, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

If you'd like to continue to receive tips yourself, you can sign up at www.biblicalparenting.org.

"Melting Snowman" cookies

2011-12-04T20:02:00.000-07:00

My mom found this idea online and they are TOO CUTE not to share. The candy is mostly re-usable Halloween treats. So you can replicate them, here's what composes each cookie:

Head = mini marshmallow, covered in frosting
Hat = mini Oreo cookie for the base + mini marshmallow, all covered in melted chocolate
Eyes = mini chocolate chips
Nose = orange Starburst cut to shape
Arms = 1/2 a mini pretzel OR a straight pretzel
Scarf = trimmed Fruit by the Foot
Buttons = mini M&Ms

Have fun!

25 Days of Christmas, 2011 Edition

2011-12-01T10:02:00.002-07:00

Once again, I've come up with an activity-a-day calendar for the 25 days leading up to Christmas. I began this in 2009, then repeated the tradition last year. It's something that the kids jump out of bed to discover each morning in December and helps keep us from lots of "good intentions" that don't actually happen because of the busy-ness of the season.

Day 1 - Ice Cream Cone Christmas Tree
Day 2 - Craft day - make paper snowflakes and candy cane reindeer
Day 3 - Home Depot Kids Workshop - making a Snowman Napkin Holder
Day 4 - Give the kids each a dollar, go to the $1 Store and let the kids pick out a toy
Day 5 - Give the kids each cash to give to someone in need sometime this month (at their discretion)
Day 6 - Load the kids into the car in PJs with warm cocoa and drive around town looking at Christmas lights
Day 7 - Bake Christmas cookies
Day 8 - Lunch with Santa
Day 9 - "Cookies With Santa" at school
Day 10 - Snow Day at Desert Ridge
Day 11 - McCormick Railroad Park Christmas lights
Day 12 - Pick 3 angels from the tree at the mall (each child's age) and have the kids shop for them
Day 13 - Make homemade Christmas cards for teachers, friends and family
Day 14 - Christmas Tea Party
Day 15 - Build a Gingerbread House as a family
Day 16 - Glendale Glitters
Day 17 - Bake Christmas cookies
Day 18 - Firepit in the backyard with roasted marshmallows and cocoa
Day 19 - Take the kids Christmas shopping for each other
Day 20 - Load the kids into the car in PJs with warm cocoa and drive around town looking at Christmas lights
Day 21 - Storytime with Curious George
Day 22 - Family Movie Night
Day 23 - Christmas camping by the tree
Day 24 - Bake a birthday cake for Jesus
Day 25 - Read the Nativity story from the Bible

Homeschooling Day 3: So Far, So Good

2011-11-30T14:57:00.000-07:00

I realize day 3 of a career of homeschooling might seem pointless to write about, but (just as I journaled about the first days after Jason was born) I know I'll eventually want to look back and see how we transitioned at the beginning of this process.

So far, things are going really well. With Ryan, that is. I've noticed Kaylin trying to get attention a little more than usual and Jason, for sure, is testing me daily. His game of choice is partial obedience. When I ask him to stand up (to get him out of his crib, specifically) he'll get up on one bended knee, like a man proposing to his girlfriend. When I ask him to stop banging his fork on the table, he does it a little more gently. When I ask him to give something to Ryan, he puts it on the table nearby. When I ask him to say, "Yes, Mommy," he says, "Yes, Daddy" or "Yes, coo-coo" is his newest favorite. When I remind him to stay on the green blanket during our learning time, he stands up and puts one foot off the blanket onto the carpet.

He is exhausting.

I think he can sense the changes that are happening. In fact, now that I think about it, I'm quite sure he's demanding a certain element of control in his life, since he's not sure what's changing and why. Hmmm...I might need to give him more control than usual...

The big kids, however, are suddenly extremely helpful. They are really stepping up and loving new responsibilities. Ryan loves taking Kaylin to the bus stop after lunch. Kaylin loves being in charge of her little brother during my one-on-one time with Ryan. They've both slipped right back into our summer morning routine of "chores before free time," getting everything done that is asked of them and still coming back to say, "What next, Mom?" So there's pros and cons this week, I guess.

I got some of my curriculum in the mail last night and realized that most of the books I purchased are pretty far below Ryan's knowledge level. When I saw, "Say the letters C-A-T...what does that spell? Trace the letters on your paper with your finger..." I was worried. Ryan's so far beyond that...he's reading chapter books! He can certainly spell cat! These books are perfect for Kaylin.

But I am following the advice of a trusted friend and we've decided to plow through all of the {seemingly} entry level business to make sure all of our bases are covered before throwing Ryan into more advanced material. Today, we went through two week's worth of spelling lessons in 20 minutes which, if nothing else, were a huge confidence builder for my son. We'll cruise through book A for the rest of this year, then probably begin book B in January, but at least I'll have the flexibility to slow down if a certain concept or spelling rule didn't sink in during his time at public school.

One thing that's working really well for us is our letter/sound flashcards. I went over these with the kids during the summer, but when we were reviewing them yesterday, I heard a little voice say, "Jason's turn!" All three kids were on the couch as I said, "Jason, what letter is this?" then "...and Kaylin, what sound does it make?" and "Ryan, can you tell me a word that ends with this sound?"

It. was. awesome. ALL of the kids were engaged and loved interacting at their own level. In the meantime, Jason will begin hearing the letter sounds, Kaylin will begin hearing how the sounds work into words and Ryan is learning the grammar rules that go along with each sound or letter combination.

Seriously, I'm already loving this decision.

Preparing to Homeschool, Part 2

2011-11-29T07:50:00.000-07:00

Now that I have figured out Ryan's learning style and chosen my curriculum, I'm ready to narrow down what each child should be working on for their age range. At first, the task was absolutely overwhelming!

In The Well-Trained Mind, the authors grouped kids into specific categories: Preschool (birth to three), Kindergarten (4-5), The Grammar Stage (1st-4th grade), The Logic Stage (5th-8th grade), and The Rhetoric Stage (9th-12th grade). I was excited to discover that I have one child in each of the first three stages...especially when it didn't occur to me that Jason would be in any stage other than, "Try to stay out of our way, wouldja?"

Lots of friends have been asking me how I'll know what to do each day. Basically, I am putting together a schedule for our learning that takes lots of breaks to get out everyone's wiggles.

A few weeks ago, I started training Jason to sit on a blanket and play with specific toys while we did homework. He knows not to get up from the green blanket and, when he gets restless, I alternatively have Kaylin and Ryan play with him while I work with the other one.

This is what I'll be working on with each child. (I'm typing this up, just in case I lose my notes!)

Jason, 2 years old

Reading
- talking (NOT a problem for me) and reading as much as possible
- ask questions about the story (to begin comprehension)
- teach letter sounds (because he already knows his letters) starting with consonants first
- sing "Old McDonald" with AEIOU and short vowel sounds instead of EIEIO and animal sounds.

Writing
- drawing pictures of circular objects (snowmen, train smoke, car wheels, Slinkies) using a counter-clockwise motion to encourage the natural shape of many of our written letters
- write letters with his finger in cookie sheets filled with rice, sand, finger paint, pudding, etc.

Math
- model counting by playing Hide & Seek (this is how he learned how to count last year)
- count backward (to blast off), by 2s, 5s and 10s

Kaylin, 5 years old

Reading
- phonics
- rules of sounds
- 5 minutes of drills (flashcards) and 5 minutes of reading, working up to 15 minutes of each

Writing
- teach proper direction of letter strokes
- encourage a continuous-stroke alphabet (instead of picking up the pencil within letters like b and d) - makes learning cursive an easier transition
- 10 minutes of instruction, 5 minutes of supervised practice

Math
- count in daily life (grocery store, baking)
- manipulatives (beans, pencils, chocolate chips) for basic addition and subtraction
- talk about money, time and shapes
- learn to write numbers
- count to 100 by 2s, 5s and 10s
- 5-10 minutes per day - more like a game, not academic

Ryan, 7 years old

Reading
- main purposes are to work up to reading quickly, well and habitually and to fill his mind with stories of every kind to develop a love for reading
- read 20-30 minutes per day
- give him simplified versions of original literature (Illiad, Odyssey, Bible stories)
- get books on tape from the library (without bells and whistles)

Spelling
- workbooks
- keep a page of trouble words, reviewing 2-3 times per week
- write different spelling rules

Grammar
- parts of speech, proper relationship between parts
- narration of stories (summarizing the plot, answering specific questions in complete sentences)

Math
- Math U See, which is very hands-on
- introducing money (you'd think MY kids would know all about money by this age)

History - I thought this recommendation was extremely interesting:
1st, 5th and 9th grades - Ancients (5000 b.c. - a.d. 400)
2nd, 6th and 10th grades - Medieval to early Renaissance (400-1600)
3rd, 7th and 11th grades - Late Renaissance to early Modern (1600-1850)
4th, 8th and 12th grades - Modern (1850-present)

The idea is to introduce history at a basic level during the Grammar Stage, then repeat the information in both the Logic Stage and Rhetoric Stage, at the appropriate age levels for each period of history. That way, by the time they're in 9th grade, reading the Illiad or the Odyssey won't be as daunting, because they know the basic stories already.

Can you tell that I'm really pumped up about this? What excites me most is re-learning WITH my kids on a lot of this stuff. I didn't retain 90% of what I learned in school and I don't want the same thing to happen to them. I specifically remember covering World War II for exactly 2 days in high school, then being tested on it. And by two days, I mean 2 one-hour classes. I can't even tell you when that war began...or any war, for that matter! And the only reason I know when the U.S. got involved was because of Pearl Harbor. Not the tragedy...the MOVIE. With Ben Afflek. Now that's just embarrassing.

I'm reading books, blog posts and articles to prepare myself for when we start schooling. I'm fully expecting there to be a horrible adjustment period for our family. I'm fully expecting to feel inadequate, unprepared and unfit to educate my kids. I'm fully expecting meltdowns...from them and me. I'm fully expecting to want to quit, but am committed to sticking with it through the summer.

This is either going to be an amazing experience or an absolute train wreck. I'm bracing myself...

Preparing to Homeschool, Part 1

2011-11-27T14:37:00.000-07:00

So I'm officially a homeschooling mom. Now what?

First things first: What on Earth am I going to teach my kids? Do you realize how many choices are out there? How many methods of homeschooling, let alone curriculum choices??? What makes one better than another? And which ones are right for MY kid?

I gathered opinions on Facebook from homeschooling friends and learned about some of the most popular curriculum choices available. Then my BFF recommended that I read through The Well-Trained Mind, A Guide to Classical Education at Home and 100 Top Picks for Homeschool Curriculum. I haven't watched t.v. in weeks...I spend all my free time reading!

Both were fascinating. In 100 Top Picks, the author explains four different learning styles that describe Ryan, Mike, Kaylin and me in creepy detail. Each style has a corny name that makes it easy to reference throughout the book and both girls and boys can be any (or a combination) of these learning styles. Here are the highlights:

Wiggly Willy (aka Ryan)
- kinesthetic learner (hands-on)
- has a short attention span
- carefree children who live for the moment
- hates being bored
- needs the freedom to move around
- works well with projects, but needs supervision
- learns better with "real" books than textbooks
- easily overwhelmed by pencil-and-paper work
- often diagnosed with ADD/ADHD

Perfect Paula (aka ME)
- responsible children who like to see that everything is done correctly
- likes things to be clearly structured, planned and organized
- have a narrow comfort zone
- feel more secure when things are orderly
- seldom act spontaneously
- follows rules and respects authority
- enjoy typical school curriculum
- would rather receive information than think creatively
- often does well memorizing or repeating information (more in early elementary grades)

Competent Carl (aka Mike)
- likes to be in control of themselves and their surroundings
- tend to be analytical, constantly trying to figure out what makes things tick
- want to know in advance what they'r doing and why
- needs curriculum with minimal busywork and review
- enjoys logically organized lessons
- typically enjoys problem solving
- can have weaker social skills
- enjoy solitary activity
- expect others to operate the same way they do
- don't find it easy to adapt to other ways of doing things
- tend to be self-motivated and enjoy long-term, independent projects
- love to brainstorm and think out loud

Sociable Sue (aka Kaylin)
- often have warm, responsive personalities
- interested in people, motivated by relationships
- care a great deal about what others think of them
- like to be recognized and acknowledged for achievements
- vulnerable to conflict and critisism
- often avoid competitions, preferring cooperation
- tend to be big picture people
- don't like memorizing names and dates for history
- love change and new things
- gets bored with the same learning format

Did you see yourself in any of those learning styles? What's interesting is that your learning style usually becomes your teaching style. That's why Mike seems to teach my kids things so well: swimming, tying their shoes, riding their bikes...he's able to break down the steps for them into "logical, organized lessons."

Apparently, Perfect Paula moms often homeschool Wiggly Willy kids because they didn't succeed in school the way they expected. This was so eye-opening for me! Now I know to be even more understanding and gracious when teaching Ryan. I need to remember that when we're doing long lessons, he needs something to fidget with in his hands and that his ansty-ness isn't a sign of disrespect. There was actually a suggestion that Wiggly Willy's memorize better (things like math facts) when jumping on a trampoline. Fascinating!

The best thing about the 100 Top Picks books is that they have a chart of all of the top 100 homeschooling curriculum rated on a scale of 1-5, based on each learning style. For instance, there is only one math curriculum that is rated a 5 (the best) for Wiggly Willy's. It's very hands-on and you'd better believe I ordered it for Ryan!!! Yet, there are a bunch of 4-5 rated Science choices, because Science tends to have more hands-on experiments.

I am getting more and more excited about teaching Ryan. We're going to take a couple of weeks off, mostly to wait for our curriculum to arrive, but also to settle into the new dynamic of having Ryan home all day.

Next, it's time to make a new daily routine/schedule. And as a Perfect Paula, I now feel NO guilt or shame in the fact that I'm more comfortable with structure and order to my day!!!

Meal Plan 11/28/11

2011-11-27T12:58:00.000-07:00

Sunday - Creamy Chicken and Broccoli Soup
Monday - Turkey Pot Pie *
Tuesday - Chicken Enchilada Quiche
Wednesday - Spaghetti and Meatballs
Thursday - Baked Potato Bar
Friday - leftovers
Saturday - Rice, Bean and Cheese Casserole

* new recipes

What 12 years of marriage looks like.

2011-11-26T20:48:00.000-07:00

Last night, my mom took all three of my kids for a sleepover and to help decorate her house for Christmas. It seems like Mike and I haven't had a date night in WEEKS, so I was giddy.

At dinner, we didn't talk much. It wasn't an awkward silence...it just seemed like there wasn't much to say. Afterward, we tried to catch a movie, but nothing sounded good, so we hit some stores to buy the remaining Black Friday deals after the crowds had cleared.

Then today, we went out to lunch (we've been bleeding money this weekend, so why bother cooking?) and I noticed the silence again. I tuned in to the fact that I was daydreaming about homeschooling. I've been thinking about it a lot lately, since Wednesday was Ryan's last day of school and I'm suddenly feeling like I need to get my act together. (long story about why we didn't wait until Christmas break...I'll spare you the details)

I wondered what Mike was thinking about, so I asked.

Me: "Whatcha thinking about, honey?"

Mike: (long pause) "Um, honestly, I was thinking about how FRUSTRATED I am (insert burst of emotion) at Arizona State right now. I mean, seriously! They started out with a 6 and 2 season and these last few weeks have just totally blown it. This really sealed the deal for Coach (insert whateverhisnameis here). They're looking at this guy out of Texas to replace him...blah blah blah...(insert boring details here)"

I wish I would have continued daydreaming quietly to myself. That one question sent off a 10 minute rant that I didn't care about one teeny bit.

(10 minutes later)

Me: "Wow. That was deep. Sorry I asked..."

Mike: "Yeah, I figured. That's why I was keeping to myself."

And that's 12 years of marriage, folks. We're already the old couple who sit in silence at restaurants. Not because there's nothing to say, but because we know the other doesn't want to hear what we're thinking about. :)

Our Christmas Card, 2011

2011-11-16T20:41:00.001-07:00

Since adding Jason to our family a couple of years ago, I've gotten out of the habit of hand-crafting my own Christmas cards. Online photo cards are just too easy and, although I've considered it each year, the last couple of years I've gone the easy route. And this year I'm doing the same.

I stumbled upon Becky Higgins' free download-able 2011 Christmas card and fell in love. I decided to fill the 12 slots with one picture from each month of 2011. I also threw together a Christmas letter, since it seems we had lots going on this year. (the pictures show visuals of several items in the to-be-attached letter)

Then last week, one of my sweet blog followers notified me that she was having a contest on her blog. The prize was 25 free Shutterfly cards...and I won! So 25 of my lucky friends/family will be receiving this beautiful card:

Stationery card

View the entire collection of cards.

I'm so excited to have my cards done and on their way to me. I claimed some of my Pampers Gifts to Grow points for 200 free Shutterfly prints and ordered the above Christmas card, plus a TON of prints that will help me get motivated to catch up on my scrapbooking. I saved over $100 with the contest code and the Pampers code.

Have you thought about your Christmas cards yet? Christmas is only 39 days away. No pressure or anything...!

Another thought: a friend of mine does Valentine letters instead of Christmas letters. She feels less stress after Christmas is over and knows that people appreciate the random mail after the influx of holiday cards in December. Isn't that a cute idea?

Happy 40th Birthday Month!

2011-11-15T12:46:00.000-07:00

I wish I could say I came up with this idea on my own, but I didn't. I read a post this summer that got me all excited about celebrating Mike turning 40 all. month. long. So yes, I had plenty of time to plan and prepare and think of ideas and shop and wrap. Just like I like it!

Mike's month of birthday gifts:
Nov 1 - bag of Starbucks coffee (his favorite, plus we were out!)
Nov 2 - can of Planters nuts with a note - "It's NUTS that you're going to be 40!"
Nov 3 - Starbucks gift card (for his business trip)
Nov 4 - "We love Daddy because..." circle map (Ryan's idea...we put it on the door when he returned from his trip)
Nov 5 - a new work shirt
Nov 6 - tacos for dinner (his favorite)
Nov 7 - Arizona State shirt
Nov 8 - a huge bag of Dark Chocolate M&Ms (his favorite)
Nov 9 - black dress socks (a mentioned necessity)
Nov 10 - new gym shorts (another mentioned necessity)
Nov 11 - cards from the kids
Nov 12 - Death Certificate (for his youth)
Nov 13 - HAPPY 40th BIRTHDAY!!! Glasses and an obnoxious "Over the Hill" lei
Nov 14 - chocolate chip cookies (his favorite)
Nov 15 - a jar of pickles (because turning 40 is sour)
Nov 16 - an updated, framed picture of the kids for his desk at his new office
Nov 17 - iPod gift card
Nov 18 - fire starters for the grill
Nov 19 - ASU decal for his car with the new fork logo
Nov 20 - "40 sucks" lollipops
Nov 21 - chapstick (he wakes me up to borrow mine as we're falling asleep and it drives me nuts!)
Nov 22 - a huge supply of Mocha Chip Frappe drink mixes (his favorite)
Nov 23 - memory foam pillow
Nov 24 - frosty beer mugs
Nov 25 - sexy panties (yes for me, but he mentioned them in jest, so I honored his request!!!)
Nov 26 - Daddy's Day Off - college football marathon
Nov 27 - to-go coffee mug
Nov 28 - a new workout shirt
Nov 29 - another huge bag of Dark Chocolate M&Ms
Nov 30 - World's Best Husband/Dad certificate

It's Happening, People! Oh, It's Happening...

2011-11-13T23:31:00.001-07:00

I recently mentioned that I've been considering homeschooling. Again. Not that I've done it before, but I've certainly considered it before!

You may remember when I struggled with this idea back in April. Going back even farther than that, I originally mentioned it back in 2009. Then I got the bug to make a school room last month. (all of those links are to catch you up, in case you wonder how I got to this point. The comments in each post, specifically on the 2009 post, are interesting reads, if you're on the fence, like I've been.)

All of this discussion came about again while Mike was laid off and job searching in September. This time, I really felt called to homeschool. I'm ready. They're ready. It's time.

When I approached Mike and asked him to pray about it, his first response was, "Can I get a job first?" The day he got a job, I reminded him to pray about it and he obviously said, "Can I get used to this new company, first?"

But it's happening. It's finally official. We're going to homeschool!!!

Until the other night, Mike still had his hesitations, but after begging him to let me do this (yes, that's how I would characterize my end of our conversation: "Please, honey. Please? Can I pu-LEASE just try this? I know you have a lot on your mind, but this is ALL I've had on my mind for WEEKS and I feel very strongly about it. Please. Please? Seriously. What's the worst that could happen?") he said I'd be on a "very short leash." If we don't see dramatic improvements in Ryan in the first nine months, he's going back to public school.

I kind of panicked. I mean literally...I had trouble breathing and realized later that I was having an anxiety attack. I've heard that it takes about a year for everyone (the parent, the child, the household) to adjust to homeschooling. Yet, I only have nine months.

Oh wait, did I not mention? We're pulling Ryan out of school at Christmas.

Why so early? I had completely intended to let him finish out his 2nd grade year, until I spoke with a friend who recently started homeschooling her 2nd grader. Her only regret about homeschooling is that she didn't pull her daughter out of school mid-year last year, like she'd originally wanted to.

That got me thinking: why wait? Why let him continue learning methods that our school system plans to use when the curriculum I choose might take a completely different path? And, in fact, many of the manuals I've read suggest that students start way back at the beginning, breezing through facts that the may already know, to make sure all of the bases are covered before he's "caught up" to his current grade level.

So I'm sure some of you are wondering what made me want to homeschool? It's a million little things, but the main thing is that I don't feel like I have enough time to teach my kids the things that I want them to know. There's no extra time to do daily Bible lessons when we're spending over an hour and a half doing homework each night at the WORST part of the day. There's no time to slow down and redirect my kids' attitudes or to address heart issues when they're nasty with each other (which is A LOT when they're in school). There's not enough time for extra curricular activities; I'm sick of rushing around to get Ryan to football or Kaylin to gymnastics.

Speaking of, I don't like the tone of our home when we're rushed. I don't like the pressure of being on someone else's time schedule - catching the bus in the morning or dropping off during a 10 minute window, having a ridiculous 90 minute, "half" half-day Kindergarten just so the district can get funding for each student, forcing Ryan to finish a math worksheet when I know he's overwhelmed and checking out mentally and certainly isn't actually learning the intended material, just to name a few.

A friend forwarded me this post about "Why I Homeschool" from Confessions of a Homeschooler. I just love so many of the things she had to say and found myself nodding along throughout the explanation. I couldn't have summed it up better myself!

So it's happening. Around Christmas break, I will begin homeschooling Ryan. Kaylin will get some schooling in the morning, then we'll send her off to afternoon Kindergarten and while she's away and Jason's napping, I'll spend a little quality time catching up my 7 year old on good old reading, writing and arithmetic. By summer, I'm hoping to have a nice little system down and we'll slide Kaylin right in to begin learning 1st grade material.

The morning after Mike gave me the "thumbs up," I woke up with such intense butterflies that I was actually a little nauseous. I had been gearing myself up for this for weeks, but hadn't let myself get too excited, just in case Mike shot me down.

But it's happening. I'm so eager that I seriously want to start tomorrow. Instead, I'll enjoy my last few weeks of having the afternoons to myself...because, if things go as planned, it's going to be a long, long time before I get the house back to myself again!

Treat Each Child Like an Only Child

2011-11-09T12:42:00.000-07:00

It's no secret that I've been struggling with my 2 year old lately. He can be completely sweet, funny, charming and affectionate. Then suddenly, he could switch to screaming, whining, hitting, stripping in the middle of a crowd, sneaking cell phones, and running full speed in the other direction when his name is called. He's completely bi-polar right now!

Last weekend, my mom watched the kids while I had a full day and Mike was out of town. As I prepared to leave, Jason's ugly side emerged. I looked at my mom sympathetically and apologized for the day she was about to experience.

When I got home that evening, she said that she'd tried something new with Jason. In addition to explaining some expectations beforehand (For example: "When I say your name, you come to me and say, 'Yes, Grandma?' - let's practice...") she tried giving Jason as much attention as she would give him if he had no siblings. She still attended to the older kids, but whenever possible, she sat with Jason on her lap, played what he wanted to play and gave him individualized attention.

And it worked.

She said he was close to perfect all day long! A shock to me and a complete relief to her!!! I've tried this strategy (when possible) this week and I've seen remarkable improvements in Jason's behavior.

Then I got to thinking about my older, more independent kids. They may only rarely have meltdowns like Jason, but I wondered if their attitudes would be different with some individual attention throughout the day, as well.

Mike's been crazy busy lately working late hours at his new job, while traveling to continue his training and still going in to help his former employer, oh, and he's still coaching Ryan's football team that Ryan can't even play on anymore. Needless to say, he hasn't been around much this month.

That means that I've had plenty of alone time with the kids and have taken the opportunities to try out this theory on them. I set up two kids to play together, then give the third child my undivided attention for a bit. Then we rotate. I do this once with the little kids in the morning while Ryan's at school, then with all three in the evenings.

Let me just say that the results have been amazing. They glow with pride for hours afterward, get along together, listen better to my instructions...it's an ideal situation.

Give it a try with your own kids! If you don't have an hour to devote to each child, start with 15-20 minutes in the morning, then again in the afternoon if there's time. You will be shocked at how smoothly the rest of your day goes!

All Things Are Possible With God

2011-11-03T13:08:00.000-07:00

(...in the car yesterday after having Ryan's cast removed and getting his final x-ray...)

Ryan: "Mom? Why did God make us with skin? Why didn't he just make us all skeletons?"
Me: "I'm not sure, honey. Maybe you can ask Him that when you get to heaven."
Ryan: "Nah, I'll forget."
Me: "Maybe you could write it down somewhere...?" (selfishly thinking that I'd like to keep his "Questions for God" list in a scrapbook)
Ryan: "The piece of paper would be too small for God to read...like a tiny little crumb. Oh wait, never mind...all things are possible with God!"

Even reading a piece of paper the size of a crumb!

"What is impossible with men is possible with God." (Luke 18:27 NIV)

A week's worth of costumes

2011-11-02T10:28:00.002-07:00

For some reason, Friday were the "fall parties" for my kids at school. I got to do a dry-run of Kaylin's hodge-podge, Fancy Nancy costume that I was thoroughly convinced would look more like Punky Brewster.

But she looked adorable. Her hair was absolutely PERFECT! Now let's see if I can recreate it on Monday night for Halloween!!!

Version 1: last week with long, flowing curls and a homemade tutu.

We ditched the ripping wings, added a feather boa and made her hair a curly, hot mess. The crooked crown was the perfect touch! She also wore a different skirt to her fall party at school so the tutu wouldn't get crushed. Version 2:

Version 3: The final product on Halloween night. Her hair wasn't curly enough and she didn't wear her boa most of the night, but she was adorable none-the-less!

Here's our weird little green spider man...he spent most of the night in the wagon, which was just fine with me!

Then there was Ryan. We don't let him be anything scary, but he desperately wanted to be a skeleton. With my vacation and Jason's birthday occupying my time, I really procrastinated buying his costume. By the time I got out to the stores, all of the cheap costumes with non-scary skeleton faces were sold out (or only XL left) and the ones in his size were $40. Um, I don't think so!! He was tempted to go as Darth Vader again because last year he didn't have the long cape. This costume was the perfect combination of the two: some weird skeleton guy with fake muscles and a long cape. I have no idea what to even call him, but he was thrilled...

He tried putting his hands on his hips to look tough, but the dumb cast limited his flexibility severely! I had to wrap the thing in Saran Wrap to keep it from catching on the cheap costume fabric.

One of the few pictures of all three kids...

My Tastefully Simple party on Saturday night lead directly into a costume party. I played along and went in costume. The crowd loved that I was a good sport about it.

Our Halloween was like most: no one ate dinner and everyone ended the night in a post-sugar meltdown. What would the holiday be without evening drama???

Happy Birthday Month!

2011-11-01T14:08:00.000-07:00

In honor of Mike turning 40 this month, I got the idea to give him one gift each day for his whole birthday month. Some of the gifts are small, some are bigger. I'll post about them all at the end of the month (I wouldn't want him stumbling upon this blog post!)

It seems like every guy we know is turning 40 this year...many within weeks of each other. One of Mike's friends turns 40 within days of Mike, so his wife and I threw them a surprise birthday party this weekend. It was funny because Jeff thought he was bringing Mike to be surprised, but the party was for both of them. Mission: accomplished!

(It looks like Mike's grabbing Jeff's butt in this picture, but I'm confident he was holding the chair behind him! Somewhat confident, that is...)

So this will be a big month for Mike. To keep him from being too down about turning 40, I'm flooding him with gifts to make sure he knows he's loved. Here's to avoiding a mid-life crisis...!!!

Woo Hoo - Jason is TWO!

2011-10-26T15:04:00.000-07:00

Our little monkey is officially two! We celebrated all day Sunday and had family over last night. The morning began with a candle in Jason's eggs and toast.

Then his birthday dinner began with a raging temper tantrum, followed by presents and cake.

Ryan got Jason laughing, as he usually does. He is the Tantrum Whisperer.

This is a new thing: sticking his tongue out while concentrating.

He also celebrated birthday #2 by going #2 on the potty this weekend THREE times. I'm so sick of cleaning up poo from his underwear...I think we're finally making progress here!

But I digress...happy birthday to my baby boy!

Favorite Things Party

2011-10-21T14:58:00.107-07:00

Is everyone familiar with Oprah's "Favorite Things" shows? Well, let me tell you...an Oprah-obsessed friend of mine decided to do her own spin on the idea and began having an annual Favorite Things Party. I wasn't able to make it last year, but this year's party convinced me that I will never miss another one!

Oprah's Favorite Things are always a random collection of her, well, favorite things. (imagine that!) What's fun about the show is that she usually ends up giving several items away to all of the audience members. I've only ever seen one of the episodes, but it was enough to get the concept.

The hostess sent out an email about a month before the party asking everyone to send in details for their two favorite things. Last year didn't have a theme, but this year we were supposed to think of our favorite gift ideas.

She also had us submit a favorite pot-luck recipe and a family Christmas tradition. She compiled everything into a great handout (including a list of whose favorite thing the item is, where to purchase it, supplies needed and cost) so no one had to take notes or ask a bunch of questions...we just sat back and relaxed!

When we arrived, everyone had a few minutes to get up in front of the group and present their favorite things. Most of us brought samples of each item and we were asked to bring one $10 item for a giveaway drawing.

The concept is such a great idea that I knew I had to share. Especially when people started pulling out their favorite things! Here are a few of the things I just have to pass along:

This meal planning board was absolutely adorable and I can't wait to make it.

Here's a view of both adorable boards: they're 11x7 cork boards covered with scrapbook paper, ribbon, binder clips and pockets to keep your recipes.

This is the back: love those 3M removable mounting strips!!!!

One more close-up look (sorry about the shadow - my finger was in front of the flash)

These are "jar lid magnets" - have your kids fill a jar lid (this one was Classen pickles) with stickers, glitter, beads, 3D items, anything...then pour Resin (from any craft store) to fill the lid and allow it to dry completely. Stick a magnet on the back and that's it. Such a cute kid craft - we're doin' it!

T-shirt bags. Seriously? For people who sew, this is too cute! Cut off the sleeves, sew a ribbon into the bottom hem of the shirt and tie it closed.

One of the hostess's favorite things was a Purple Cow 9" Laminator. She contacted the company to see if they had any money in their advertising budget to contribute to the Favorite Things party, and they sent her enough laminators for ALL of us to have one!!! Our hilarious friend, April, played Oprah, pointing to each person and shouting, "And YOU get a laminator...and YOU get a laminator...!!!" I can now officially understand why the women on that show freak out. Me and my Type A personality were SO excited to get a laminator. For FREE!!! Here's a picture of all of us with our new treasures.

We decided that we're each going to try to contact a company or two next year to see if we can get enough donations for everyone to leave with different goodies. If 30-40 of us make the attempt, maybe a handful will get a good response...? Even if they send us coupons (some of the Favorite Things were food) - everyone loves freebies and they'd get tons of loyal customers from the deal!

Other ideas that I loved:
- Homemade hooded towels
- glitter nail polish (this was a part of a "holiday survival kit" that was so cute)
- Little Fing'rs Girlie Nails (Kaylin will get these from Santa this year)
- Paperbackswap.com - apparently you can sign up and get points for sending your used books to others, then "buy" new books with your online credited points. All it costs is the price of media mail to send your books!
- Portable speaker case for iPod
- Personal Embosser from Williams Sonoma
- Solutions Tree Tea Chapstick from Great Clips (of all places!)
- White Tea Body Lotion (I love this stuff!!!)

And I know I'm going to get this question, so I'll tell you: the favorite things gift ideas I shared were Tastefully Simple (of course!) and framed family pictures. One that I thought of later were homemade calendars with family pictures. As you'd imagine, I give a lot of gifts revolving around pictures.

What are some of your tried-and-true holiday gift giving ideas???

A Lesson on Jealousy

2011-10-18T12:46:00.000-07:00

(I just found this un-published post in my drafts from 10/4/11. Publishing it now to capture the memory of my sweet girl!)

This morning, Ryan woke up to $3 under his pillow from the Tooth Fairy. He was hoping to get enough to buy himself a hot lunch today at school, so he could tell everyone where he got the money for his meal. (I'm not sure where this kid gets this constant need for attention...it's a mystery...!) ;)

Then during breakfast, the doorbell rang. Ryan got the opportunity to pet sit for a friend's Guinea pig while they were out of town for nine days. In the thank you note was $27...a payment of $3 per day. Ryan was suddenly sitting among dollar bills everywhere.

Once he left for school, I noticed that Kaylin was unusually quiet...and had been all morning. This was our conversation:

Me: "Kaylin, are you doing okay?"
Kaylin: "Yeah." (with an unconvincing tone)
Me: "How are you feeling right now?"
Kaylin: "I don't know..."
Me: "Are you feeling happy?"
Kaylin: "I don't know..."
Me: "Are you feeling sad?"
Kaylin: "I don't know..."
Me: "Are you feeling angry?"
Kaylin: "I don't know..."
Me: "Are you tired?"
Kaylin: "I don't think so..."

(continued eating our breakfast for a bit)

Me: "Kaylin, are you feeling okay? You're acting awfully quiet."
Kaylin: (looking down) "I don't know..."

(...string of silence...then it hit me...)

Me: "Are you feeling jealous that Ryan got so much money this morning?"
Kaylin: (with a guilty look on her face) "Yeah..."
Me: "Do you know what 'jealous' means?"
Kaylin: "No."
Me: "You feel jealous when you wish you had something that someone else has. Are you feeling jealous that Ryan has all that money?"
Kaylin: (the floodgates opened) "It's just that Ryan already has SO MANY DOLLARS."
Me: "Do you know WHY Ryan has so many dollars?"
Kaylin: "No..."
Me: "Because he's seven. And you're five. He's had two whole years, more than you have, to add money to his piggie bank." (Kaylin smiled)
Kaylin: "So when I'm seven will I have that many dollars?"
Me: "Probably. Maybe more!"

And she smiled again, finally content with the situation.

A School Room is Born!

2011-10-17T22:21:00.001-07:00

I have really been struggling with the after-school rush lately. The kids have trouble focusing on homework at the kitchen table, Jason is rarely captivated by distractions, time is was short due to football practices and games 3 days/week (no more football for him, now that his arm is broken!) - all combined with the already crazy dinner hour. Every evening is stressful in our home and I'm really just OVER IT.

While in Kansas City last week, I began getting the itch again to homeschool. The after school issue is one of a dozen reasons homeschooling makes sense at this stage of our lives. A dear friend gave me a ton of books and resources and so much time alone left me tons of space to think about the logistics. Nothing's set in stone, but this very well could be the kids' last year in public school for a while. Mike and I are really praying that we'd both have peace about the decision one way or the other.

But I'm not ripping them out of school right now. So we still have an after school problem! In the meantime, I was desperate for a solution to the 3-5pm witching hour.

The answer finally came to me: if/when I homeschool, I'll need a space dedicated to our school day. So I decided to convert half of my craft room into a school/homework room! I got the bug Friday night to pull everything apart and rearrange, got everything in the room organized on Saturday and the closet finished on Sunday. When I'm motivated, I'm like a machine! And Mike was thrilled that I didn't spend a penny on the transformation...I just repurposed a bunch of stuff we had hiding around the house.

Before: from the doorway

After: from the doorway

Before: reverse view

After: reverse view

Before: attempt at a kid's art station

After: new school station
(the desk on the left will hold the hand-me-down computer as soon as we get our new Mac)

Before: scrapbook area
(I haven't scrapbooked in months...my desk had become a dumping ground)

After: scrapbook area
PLUS a new art station and reading corner (they're small, but they're intentional!)

Before: closet

During: empty closet

During: contents of closet on the floor (can you see where I sat in the middle?)

During: 5 minutes later...the contents of the boxes were EVERYWHERE

After: closet

All of the bins are labeled and organized - and not a dime was spent!!!

Jason kept himself busy stacking Dixie cups while Mike helped me rearrange furniture on Friday night

the new "art station"

the new "reading station"
with a book box for each child (under the easel)

Jason's corner
I'll rotate toys up from the playroom to keep him distracted while I help with homework

Mommy's corner/scrapbook station

Now that the clutter is gone, I was so inspired to create that I got caught up on the kids' birthday scrapbooks. I was 2 years behind on Ryan, 3 years behind on Kaylin and Jason's wasn't even started. I kind of like that my scrapbook area is now a corner of the room instead of the whole space. Hopefully, it will keep me accountable to keeping it neat!

#10 - Take a trip back to Kansas City

2011-10-13T20:48:00.002-07:00

Wow - what a vacation! After six days in Kansas City with the sweetest girl in the world, I made some observations. Some good, some bad...

First of all, I discovered that time alone with my attention-hungry, middle child is an absolute necessity. This is something that I need to remind myself of often; as in daily. I truly enjoy her company and her maturity never ceases to amaze me. She's a 15 year old trapped in a 5 year old's body...without the hormones!

I discovered that there really IS no place like home. Yes, I just said that! But seriously, as I was driving from the airport to my aunt's house (...no, not Auntie Em...Aunt Claudia) I got all choked up. I hadn't been back to Kansas in more than six years and I had no idea how much I'd missed it. Not to mention that the fall colors were beautiful!!!

I discovered that indulging your child (and yourself) for a few days can take some time to un-do. Kaylin is no longer used to hearing "no" or sharing attention with her brothers. And I'm no longer used to cooking, cleaning, or being responsible in any way, shape or form. Plus, my hands are broken...I can't type as fast as I did last week! A week away from the computer ruined my typing speed. Curses!

Lunch at Nordstrom, shopping sprees and mani/pedi anyone? My aunt treated me like royalty.
I didn't lift a finger all week!

I discovered that, over time even (seemingly) lifelong friendships fade away. I only had a handful of old friends that I made plans with during my trip. A few of the meetings felt like high school all over again (in a good way), but one was traced with awkwardness and obvious discomfort. I drove away realizing that I might never choose to see that person again and was very, very sad...

(Sidenote: how CUTE are these little collage frames? One of my above friends filled them with seasonal decor because she couldn't find pictures small enough to fit in them. STEALING this idea!!!)

I discovered that eating desserts and not working out leads to weight gain. Who knew? (I'll spare you the picture of the back fat and belly rolls that go along with this discovery.)

I discovered that distance makes the heart grow fonder. I don't think I've been away from my boys that long in...well, ever!

I discovered that when you leave with more items than you brought, and you get the brilliant idea to buy a duffel bag from Good Will to transport it all home, that you should check to make sure the dumb bag has a zipper BEFORE you pack it up and are running late for the airport!!!

We sent "Flat Ryan" to Kansas to have some adventures with my aunt and cousins, so I got to take pictures to show real Ryan. This is Flat Ryan rolling in the fall leaves. Real Ryan may never get that experience...!

Kaylin was so good on the plane. SO. GOOD. Even the flight attendant asked, "Is she always this well behaved?" I said, "Yes. This is why she got to come on the trip and I left my wild boys at home."

Speaking of "wild boys," I returned home to a broken kid. The stupid curb jumped up and knocked Ryan off his bike. (*sigh*)

I didn't tell Ryan to pose for this picture, by the way. Such a goofy kid!

So #10 is finally crossed off my {expired} 101 goals in 1001 days list. Yay!!!! I had so much fun that I actually wished we were in a position to move back. Especially since every single friend made that suggestion and I was feeling all nostalgic. (I drove by two old houses, my elementary school and my high school) Maybe someday, but once I returned home, I remembered why I love Phoenix, too. (and it's not the 100 degree temperatures that welcomed me at the airport...)

Creating a Heart Script

2011-10-06T07:14:00.000-07:00

I'm headed to Kansas City today with my favorite girl for a week, so I thought I'd leave you with a reassuring parenting tip that I received in my email this morning. It reminds me of something else I read recently: Our children may not remember specific sentences or individual discussions that we have with them, but our teachings more often blends into an overall feeling or impression; similar to how an artist makes individual brush strokes of color that end up blending into a beautiful, unified picture.

Don't underestimate the influence and importance of casual conversations that you have with your kids throughout their childhood. Or the (seemingly) nagging reminders that come out of your mouth over and over and over! Please enjoy this piece from Biblical Parenting.

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Many times we, as parents, don't see the results of our discipline as fast as we'd like. The process is slow, at best, and change seems to be taking a long time. In those situations we need to focus on building a tape in our child's heart.

Think about some of the things your parents said over and over again that continue to play in your mind. "Turn off the lights before you leave the room." "Eat your vegetables." "Be nice to your sister," "Say excuse me." Did you heed their instructions then? Maybe not, but the tape still plays in your head.

It may not appear that your children are listening but loving and consistent reminders have a long-term effect. It's important what you say and how you say it, though, because children will remember. If your words have a pattern of being harsh and critical, that tape also will continue to play later on.

Simple observations repeated over and over can go a long way. If you have one son who is continually picking on another, he may have a character weakness in the area of kindness. Make statements and observations that add to the tape. "Johnny, you need to be kind." "Johnny, it looks like you're being selfish and not thinking of Billy's feelings." "Johnny, was that the loving thing to do?" "Johnny, let's not be hurtful."

As we repeat instructions and make observations, we're impacting the hearts and minds of our children, whether we see the results in their behavior or not. Change takes time. It's important to pray that God will use our words to make lasting changes in our kids. We may not actually see the results as fast as we would like, but we are building a tape that will last a long time. Take a moment and think about the tape you're creating in your child's heart. Is it the one you want remembered?

Consider what you'd like your child to say to himself or herself and begin to repeat those words throughout the day. In doing so you'll be creating a heart script to help your child mature.

(This tip comes from the book, Home Improvement, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.)

Advice for the Terrible Two's

2011-10-02T22:24:00.001-07:00

Thank you for the all of the comments regarding my recent post: He's not even two yet, folks...! I have to tell you: since writing that, things haven't been too bad. Maybe I just needed to get everything down on {virtual} paper and let it go? Once I typed out all of the issues that drive me nuts, it was almost like I accepted that we were going to be dealing with those behaviors for a long, long time. And I've been praying. A lot.

That post was also coming fresh off our trip to Disneyland, where Jason was getting very poor sleep, eating tons of sugary treats and we were all completely out of routine. I can't tell you how many times I looked at strangers {embarrassed} and said, "He's such a good listener..." with complete sarcasm.

At one point during our trip, we all split up to be efficient: Mike and Ryan went to stand in line to race cars, my mom held our place in line to see the Princesses, and I took Kaylin and Jason to look around and keep them busy. We went to Toontown and I saw a very short line to see Minnie Mouse. I pulled Jason out of his stroller, threw the diaper bag and camera bags over my shoulder and stood in line with Kaylin. Jason was getting heavy (not to mention the bags), so I put him down, giving him strict instructions to stay close to me. One minute, he was quietly playing near my feet and the next minute, he sneaked under the rope divider and darted across Toontown. In a panic, I begged the mom behind me (we had been chatting) to keep an eye on Kaylin while I ran after Jason. One of the bags got caught as I tried hopping over the rope divider and I practically fell flat on my face. I still (2 weeks later) have a giant bruises on my leg. All because Jason didn't so much as *pause* when I shouted his name. He just kept running.

That's why he spent the majority of our vacation in his stroller.

Anyway, back to my post about Jason's ~~Terrible~~ Trying Twos behavior: one of the comments on my blog was particularly encouraging, and was followed up with an email that I received permission to share. For those of you who appreciate my blunt honesty, you will enjoy this post. This is a new reader, Liz, and she writes mini-novels, just like me...so for those of you dealing with independent, strong-willed little ones, get comfortable!

-----------------------------

Her original comment to the post:

Hi! I'm new here. I found you by way of somebody else, just strolling around the intereebs during my one moment of peace today! Lol. Anyway...I can SO sympathize. My oldest was SO like that!!! He has now just turned four, and it is SO much better. Some things that have worked very well for us:

1. Fish oil. Seriously. Trader Joe's makes gummies with no artificial color (see #2) and they have worked wonders.

2. Take him off ALL food coloring, especially red-40. Take him off as much processes everything as possible. Sometimes, food allergies manifest as behavior issues. Red40 is one of the worst for that.

3. A book called "Making the terrible twos terrific" by John Rosemond helped us a lot.

4. Focus on one behavior at a time, and do everything you can to encourage him to do it well. Punish if you have to, but try to focus on encouraging the right behavior. Even a tiny. Little. Bit of the right behavior. Some kids--mine being one--DO NOT respond to punishment, fear, or shame. You have to steer them by encouragement. It takes some getting used to, and it doesn't mean that you shouldn't hold him responsible for his behaviors, but...encouragement will get you FAR further. I would be happy to share some personal examples of what we have done with our child, if you want. Hang in there, you can do it! :) Liz

-----------------------------

(I emailed asking for personal victories that she's experienced and this was her response...)

Hi, Katie!

First of all, try not to beat yourself up. Every kid is different, but it doesn't mean he's bad. He is going to teach you to stretch yourself--in good ways. :)

I must reiterate, I cannot tell you what a difference the fish oil made. Night and day difference. Please, get yourself as quickly as possible to a Trader Joe's (or wherever) and get him some fish oil! We like the gummies, because they taste good so there's no fight getting them into him. But there are other ways. Find what works for you. A word of caution about the gummies though--make sure to brush his teeth after.....we learned the hard way that gummies make ideal cavity starter. Yeesh! But you know what? STILL TOTALLY WORTH IT. (We ran out once, because our once-monthly trip to Trader Joe's got delayed by a week...it was a MISERABLE week. I swore I would never be late again!!!)

Think of it as a brain-chemistry deficiency--and the fish oil (Omega 3's, mostly-) replaces whatever is missing in the brain, at least somewhat, and allows them to function more normally. Just like when a person is deaf--they have a deficiency, but they can cope. But when they get a cochlear implant, they are like WHOA! NORMALCY! haha. They are still deaf, but they now have the option of at least relatively normal hearing!

That really solved a BUNCH of our problems. The rest of it, is training yourself in what works for his personality....which is the harder part!

Now, obviously, I haven't met Jason, so I can't like "diagnose" him or anything (and I'm definitely not a doctor! LOL) but *IF* he were to have the same brain chemistry issues that my son has, there is a chance he might be ADHD. My husband and I both are (I do not have the hyperactivity, just the inattentiveness) and yes, my older son DEFINTELY exhibits a lot of the symptoms. I tell you this only because I am learning SO MUCH about how the ADHD brain--and personality--work. It really can be quite a beautiful thing, once you learn how to deal with it! So, a lot of my strategies are things I've learned that work for ADHD kids. But regardless of what your son may or may not have, if it works, YAY!

There are two tricks that seem to work WONDERS for us. The first one is encouragement, encouragement, encouragement. The second one is, whatever the problem is, making the problem HIS, not YOURS. I'll give you some examples.

My son was an absolute SLOB. (well, okay, he got it from me. It's an ADHD thing and also a personality thing. But its also because *I'm* a slob. *sigh*) He would pull out EVERY SINGLE TOY at one time. I mean, not even playing with them....just...dumping out the bins off the shelf just for the sake of dumping htem and seeing all the toys on the floor. GAAAH, right?? I could spend 45 minutes sorting all the toys back to their respective bins (I'm *trying* to learn to be organized....lol) Animals in one, cars in another, etc. And in 4 seconds flat, he could dump everything out again. It was enough to make me want to cry, scream, lock him in a closet (okay, not really) on more than one occasion.

Until I realized several things:

1.I was making the mess MY problem, not HIS.

2.Also, he wasn't doing it to upset me--that was just a side benefit. (Knowing that he had the power to control an adult's reactions, would reasonably be highly addictive to a little person, right?) He was doing it because he loved the feeling of the cars pouring out, and the sight of them goign everywhere. Or whatever. He saw that he could affect a serious change on his environment, and enjoyed doing it. That is completely age-appropriate. No matter how annoying. ha.

3.And, this HAD to change, if we were going to survive the next 16 years together. lol Thus, it was MY responsibility to make sure it changed. AND, I knew he did NOT respond to punishment, shame, or guilt, etc.

Anyway....so, several things happened. First, I put away 80% of his toys, when he was asleep. As in, up high, where he couldn't reach them. This was not to punish him, but to make the task of cleaning MUCH easier. This immediately brought hope to MY world, which made me less stressed.

Then, when he would make a mess with what was available, I would say, "Hey! Let's go play in your room!" Which of course, he was very excited about. And then I would point out the mess and how it was going to be impossible to play in his room with all this mess! So, we would start VERY SMALL (some ADHD folks get overwhelmed very quickly, so we have to break tasks down into very small components) and JUST look for the cars, for example. And of course he would quickly get distracted by some of the other toys, so I would point out, "there's a GREEN CAR! Grab the green car and toss it to me!" and I would try to catch it in the bucket, or whatever. So we made a game out of it, which made it fun. ADHD folks have NO DESIRE to do stuff unless it's fun. I mean, WAY more than the average person, who can be shamed, guilted, or "duty-ed" into doing stuff....for us...you HAVE TO make it fun or we just don't care. Anyway....so we made a game of just picking up the cars, and each time he picked one up and put it in the bin, I would praise him. "YAY, good PICKING UP that car! Can you go get that blue one over there?" See the encouragement? And the more praise he got, the more he wanted to continue to earn my praise. Also, notice that HE was cleaning up the toys, NOT ME. And as soon as the task was over, he got to play with me in his room. So he got reward for his task being done. ZERO punishment, shaming, or guilt. Just encouragement and reward. But, HE was the one held responsible for his behavior, as it was HE who was doing the cleaning up.

You have to somewhat plan ahead for teaching moments like these...you can't do them when you're in a hurry. You have to expect that it's going to take a LOT longer than if YOU did it by yourself, which for busy moms can be VERY hard to deal with. Kind of like potty training! It is a long-term investment. Worth making the time for. Also, keep the task VERY short, and VERY limited, so that he sees the success immediately, and it's done (or at least over) before he has a chance to get frustrated. Also, pick a behavior to work on that is an easy one....i.e., don't start with the one you think is his worst trait, right out of the gate! Start with something less intense. concentrate on only one thing at a time, for however long it takes for it to become habit. Weeks, possibly, before moving on to the next one. And always, always, try to catch him "being good". Anytime you see him doing any little bit of something that fits into your goal for the target behavior, point it out. Anytime you see him clearly choosing NOT to do the target behavior, instead of punishing him or reprimanding him, say, "Hey Jason, remember, you are not supposed to be doing that. Can you please do [target behavior] instead? Let me see! And then praise, praise, praise.

So anyway....we practiced the cleaning up thing a LOT. His daddy would do it with him,too. And of course, Daddy Time is Special, so that helped A LOT. Lots of encouragement, from the people he loves most. Small, quickly completeable tasks, lots of praise. Be very specific, too. YOu can't just tell him, "clean up all the cars". That's a generalization that older kids and most adults can handle, but not little kids. ESPECIALLY little kids with possible brain chemistry issues! OR some adults, for that matter! (*ahem*) For example, my husband and I might have different definitions of what a clean kitchen is. He tells me, please clean the kitchen. I say, I did already! See the problem? So, being as specific as possible in your expectation, can also help.

We had problems with the shoes in the car, too. My kid just doesn't like to wear shoes. So.....we take them in the car with us, wherever we're going, and just put them on him when we get there. There really isn't any reason he HAS to have shoes on IN the car, and it saves me the aggrivation of having to fight him to get them on, and then FIND THEM and put them on AGAIN. Happy kid, non-stressed Mommy. WIN! If he still refuses to allow his shoes to be put on, he doesn't get out of the car. So practice a few times, in places like a favorite park, where if you have to, you can LEAVE HIM THERE, strapped in, for a few minutes, (but still see him from like 15 feet away) while letting him see that compliance wins him FUN, while NON compliance does NOT win him a frustrated mommy (cause that's fun) but merely no fun for him. That makes it HIS problem. He's stuck in the car, because he would not wear his shoes, while Mommy and sibs are having fun without him!! Then, after 5 or so minutes, go back to him and say, "are having fun sitting in the car? No? Are you ready to put your shoes on so you can join us?" It's HIS choice. If he's ready, praise him, help him with his shoes, and let him out. If he chooses no, say, "Okay. I'll be back in a little bit" and leave him there again. He will eventually get the hint!

One of the BIG things we had to work on with my son, was running away from me when I called him. He thought it was a game! I called, he ran, I chased. Um.....that means it is MY problem. I had to find a way to make it HIS problem. So, I would call him, and I would say, "Kai, if I have to come get you, you will get a spanking. Come to me by yourself". And of course, he would run, and I would have to catch him, and he immediately got a solid spanking and I would reiterate, "When Mommy tells you to come, YOU MUST COME". This is no joke, it is a safety issue of the highest order. I do not spank very often, but for safety issues, it is a must (in my book). After about six spankings in a row, he got the picture. Then, as he began to come when called, he got a BIG hug, and a "Good job! Mommy called you, and you came! GOOD JOB!!" Then....he would do The Test. He would come halfway, and wait to see what I would do. I realized I a choice. I could go to him (he wins!) or I could repeat my call and see if he comes the rest of the way. When he didn't, I would go to him and spank him, just as if he had not complied at all. Because partial compliance is still partial non-compliance, which in safety issues cannot be tolerated.

Okay, so this is a novel! SORRY!!! If this is helpful to you, I will happily write more! Let me know. :)

No matter what, your child is very lucky, because he has a mom who cares enough to be frustrated by his behavior, and be willing to do what it takes to fix it! You're a good mom. Be encouraged!!

;) Liz

Day 1001

2011-09-28T13:54:00.000-07:00

On December 30, 2008, I created a list of 101 goals that I wanted to accomplish in 1001 days. Somehow, I completed 88 of the 101 goals (with a few more to be accomplished next month) which absolutely shocks me. I was hoping to do at least half...I had no idea I'd fulfill so many of them!

When I created this list, Mike was laid off from his job, so some of the big-dollar items seemed like pipe dreams. Ironically, as the 1001st day arrives , we find ourselves in the same situation. Mike's last day of work is Friday.

But I still feel a huge sense of accomplishment. Thanks for humoring me through this little project of mine. It was fun! But I think I need a break before creating new long term goals. Here's the list, with the unfulfilled items in bold. (and my defensive reasons that they are incomplete in bold italics)

Jason-isms...a positive look at the nearly-two year old

2011-09-24T13:13:00.003-07:00

Jason's attempt at smiling for the camera...bless his heart!

After trashing my poor youngest child the other day, I thought I'd document some of the cuter things he's been saying lately. Because when he isn't being a little monster, he really is quite cute.

"Chicken" = chicken, but also KITCHEN

"Old Madonna" = Old McDonald

"Burger Burger" = hamburger

"Train Book" = Thomas the Train (because he has a Thomas book and we refer to it as the "train book" - but my mom bought him an electric Thomas toothbrush for when he finally goes #2 on the potty and he says, "Trainbook toothbrush...poopoo potty!")

"Football Game" = a football (he also says, "down, set, hike" when he's playing with the football)

"Horsey Movie" = a horse (he thinks the movie Tangled is the horsey movie)

"Monkey Movie" = a monkey

"Movies Popcorn" = the movie theater

"Fruit Salad" = fruit leather

"Fruit Snacks" = all snacks of any kind

"Ocean Liner" = the ocean (thank you, Baby Einstein!)

"Bus Stop" = a school bus (I heard him saying, "Dut-tup, Kaylin" the other day and thought he was telling her to shut up. I was appalled b/c we don't say that in our family and I let him know it. He looked confused, and now that I'm typing this, I think he was trying to tell her that we passed a school bus. He might have said, "Dus-tup." OOPS!)

He sings, "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, how I wun-da what you ahh. Up bah bah bah word so high..."

Also, the other night on the way home from California, he compiled his greatest hits to sing for us. It started with "Where is Thumbkin?" then he said, "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star? Okay..." and started singing that, but halfway through, stopped and finished up his ABCs, then said, "Jesus Loves Me? Okay..." and busted into that one. My mom was crying she was laughing so hard. It literally seemed like a "Jason's Greatest Hits" private concert.

On the tougher days, I need to remember these Jason-isms to keep me from pulling my hair out. Plus, it's easier to focus on the positive...because there is so, so many more negative moments that fill our day. UGH!

#19 - Share my faith with a stranger

2011-09-23T12:30:00.006-07:00

This proved to be a much more challenging goal than I would have ever imagined. I purposefully looked for ways to share my faith with strangers over the last 3 years, but it's hard when I live in a little {mostly} Christian, stay-at-home-mom bubble! I don't get out much, unless I attempt to talk to a stranger at the car wash or the gym. And what am I going to say, "Can I tell you why I love Jesus?"

Talk about scaring someone off!

I almost shared my faith with my cashier at Trader Joe's last year. The quick conversation set it up perfectly, but I chickened out. Once I was back in my car, I realized that if I hadn't chickened out, what would have made that cashier receptive to hearing about my faith after only meeting me 5 minutes earlier?

That was when I decided that I would redefine "stranger." I don't think many people are open to hearing anything from a perfect stranger. And if they are open, they usually just nod and smile and think, "How nice for them that they feel that way."

My new definition of "stranger" transformed into someone that I would meet from that point forward. Before sharing something so personal, like my faith journey, I decided it was best to have a foundation of trust in a relationship first.

But the fact remained: I didn't meet many new people. Pre-school was about the only place I could think of where I would meet other moms, but that wasn't on my mind as I chatted with the moms at drop off and pick up each week. Soon, weeks turned into months and I quickly forgot about looking for opportunities to share my faith and hope in Jesus Christ.

Then Tastefully Simple came into my life. Do you have any idea how many HUNDREDS of people I've met because of this business? My sphere of influence has definitely broadened, that's for sure!

One day this summer, after praying for God to open a door for a conversation, it happened. One of my hostesses had to cancel her party because she was diagnosed with breast cancer. When I went to her house to collect the party food kit, we started talking. She remembered when I asked how I could pray for her and she began sharing how she started reading her Bible since the diagnosis. She stopped going to church years ago and suddenly found a need for God in her life again.

Let me set up the scene for you: we were standing at her front door while chatting and my van was parked and running on the curb by her driveway. Her street was being re-paved and only one lane was usable. Can you picture it?

AS I OPENED MY MOUTH to share my story, we heard a loud honk. A truck, pulling a huge trailer, was trying to get around my van and couldn't proceed unless I moved my vehicle. Within a split second the conversation was over.

Looking back, I think God was testing me. Testing to see if I was really ready to do it. Knowing how often I've chickened out in the past, not wanting to seem pushy, not wanting to intrude my beliefs on someone else, not wanting to appear judgmental, not knowing if I would have the answers to their potentially skeptical questions. But I wasn't afraid anymore! And for some reason, that was not the time or the place that God wanted me to share my faith.

My time did finally come, quite recently actually. But I'm not going to be specific about the situation because so many circles of friends, Tastefully Simple clients and now my Tastefully Simple team read my blog. And many of the people in those groups seem to be inter-woven.

But I was proud of the conversation. I hope the girl I spoke with was receptive, although she seems very, very far from being at a place in her life where she would accept my faith as her own. Thankfully, that's not my goal. My purpose was not to convert a stranger to fall in love with Jesus, my purpose was simply sharing my story to plant a seed, then let God take it from there, using me only as He saw fit. The cool thing is that I will continue to have plenty of opportunities to meet with this person, so this might not be the end of this story!

In addition to this incredible conversation, I was able to invite someone to church recently and they agreed to come! It seems that the people I ask always decline my invitation, but I have an actual church-date this weekend and I'm very excited.

So that's that. #19 is crossed off my 101 in 1001 list and I'm no longer scared of situations where people ask me about my faith. Yay!

#82 - Take a spin class (without leaving in the middle)

2011-09-22T17:14:00.015-07:00

Whew! That was exhausting. I knew my lungs and muscles had the endurance to make it through an entire spin class, but I was not so confident about my butt. The reason I hate spin/cycle classes is simple: my butt goes numb.

I walked into the spin room at the gym this morning and was discouraged to see this die-hard instructor that's been there forever. I laughed at myself as I tried to adjust the seat and handlebars, looking at the girl next to me admitting, "Yeah, this is my first time." I was so relieved to hear her respond, "It's my second! I couldn't believe I made it through the whole class on Monday, so I came back again." At least I'm not the only loser who is intimidated!

The class started and I heard Bon Jovi's "Livin' on a Prayer" begin. Oh yes, the music this girl played was just that awesome. Long live big-hair bands! (I think everyone should sit back and enjoy watching a young Jon Bon Jovi for a moment...totally worth 4 minutes of your day!)

So I made it through. My water bottle was empty, my sweat towel was soaked and I looked at the clock every 5 minutes, but me and my butt made it through the whole 60 minute class. It was an amazing workout and I was really proud of myself!

#82 is finally crossed off my 101 in 1001 list (with a mere 4 days to spare) and, I hate to admit, but I might end up going back to take another class.

But no promises that I'll stick it out the whole hour...!

He's not even two yet, folks...

2011-09-22T11:50:00.017-07:00

I feel cheated. I feel totally and completely cheated out of the last few weeks and days of my baby boy's life before he's supposed to hit the "terrible twos." Because seriously, this kid has redefined "terrible" for me this month.

I know what you're thinking: "Oh, she probably hasn't thought of ___________..." or "Maybe she should try _________..." You have a suggestion? I'll take it. But honestly, I've spent more time analyzing and agonizing over this kid than I care to admit. Am I being too controlling? Not giving him enough choices? Giving him too many choices? Too much freedom? Am I being inconsistent? Am I being inflexible? Am I being a good example? Are the kids encouraging him to disobey? Is he not getting enough attention? Should I take away toys? Privileges? Attention? Should I ignore his behavior? Should I choose my battles more carefully? Am I not choosing enough battles and letting him get away with too much?

When he's in a mood, he is a nightmare. And this bi-polar boy flips like a switch with no warning. You think I'm over-exaggerating?

He says, "no" to everything.

When I call his name, he runs the other direction.

When he doesn't run the other direction, he comes half-way to me and sits down. Or crawls to me. Or walks backward. Or hits me and dances around.

When I ask him to look at my eyes (that's how I get my kids to focus on what I'm saying) he deliberately looks away.

When I hold his hand in the street, he sits down and screams, "NOOOO!"

When I try to pick him up, he goes limp like a wet noodle.

When I try to change his clothes, he pulls his knees into his chest.

When I put on his shoes, he kicks wildly.

When other people are putting on their shoes, he takes one and runs across the house, refusing to return it, then holds on with a kung foo grip while screaming bloody murder when you try to retrieve it.

He throws food.

And books.

And toys.

He throws anything.

At everyone.

He wanted a refill of water and I didn't come over to take his cup away quickly enough, so he threw it at Kaylin's face, splitting her lip open.

He pinches for no reason.

He scratches for no reason.

He hits for no reason.

He takes his shoes and socks off in the car and throws them, requiring a search and rescue mission upon arriving at our destination.

He arches his back when getting buckled into his carseat, so I can't fasten the latches.

He spits water down his shirt and looks around waiting for a laugh, then complains, "All wet, Mommy."

He only has one volume and it is louder than you could ever imagine.

He's so rough.

And messy.

He pulls on piles of folded laundry.

He un-sets the dinner table, scattering the plates and silverware all over the house.

He removes items from the pantry.

He destroys everything tidy in his path.

And he has more energy than the rest of our family put together.

I used to judge the parents who bought their kids leashes disguised as "backpacks," but I have to admit that I was extremely jealous of those parents as we walked around Disneyland. Those dumb things are pure genius.

I want my baby back. I was almost in tears the other day, completely exasperated, praying to God for wisdom and peace and patience with this stranger when he's being a little monster.

Then I heard him singing "Where is Thumbkin" in his sweet, little high-pitched voice. And I was able to calmly make it through a few more hours.

Until nap time when I decided to undress him on the bathroom counter. He wouldn't pick up his feet to take off his shorts & underwear from around his ankles and I soon discovered why: he thought he was in front of the toilet and peed ALL OVER ME. While screaming in disgust, I had the presence of mind to turn him toward the sink, but he peed across the floor, counter, and walls in transition.

Sweet Jesus, please tell me when this madness will end...

Quicky Weekend Getaway - Disneyland!!!

2011-09-20T14:41:00.000-07:00

Someone had the bright idea to go to Disneyland for a 3-day weekend. (um yeah, that would be me) Sounds fun, right?

Well. Did you know that it is nearly impossible for a family of four (Jason was free) to do a one day, one park, 3-day weekend for under $1000? The beach is FREE, so I thought it would be a cheap vacation, but oh no. Ticket prices are sky high, not to mention hotel and gas costs, then there are the basic necessities like transportation, food and water.

Thank goodness my mom came along and shared some of her timeshare points with us. Plus, I had no idea how incredibly handy it would be to have the same number of adults as children. Especially with a potty-training, becoming-terrible-before-turning-two little boy. (*sigh*) But that's a post for another day.

(This is Jason's "smile" - isn't he cute trying to be cute?)

We arrived on Saturday afternoon to a Halloween-ed out Disneyland. We walked around Downtown Disney that evening and ate at Rain Forrest Cafe for dinner. The kids bought souvenirs, I found myself a Disney Christmas ornament memento and some Mickey-shaped truffles, we fixed the flat tires on the stroller, it was a great start to our mini-vacation.

My priorities during our day at Disney included: visiting characters, taking Kaylin through the Princess Fantasy Tour and completing "Jedi training" for Ryan. Riding rides, seeing the parade and fireworks, face painting and everything else was just icing on the cake. We arrived at 9:30am and set out on a mission to check the must-dos off the list.

We went to Jedi training twice...the first time, Ryan wasn't interested in going on stage, then (after thinking about it all day) he decided he wanted to go again. Thankfully, he was picked from the audience! He's officially a Jedi. He has a certificate and everything.

Grandma treated the kids to face painting!

Jason and I played in the fountain in Toon Town while everyone else went on a roller coaster.

Ryan did NOT enjoy himself. Is it wrong that this picture of him screaming makes me laugh? Kaylin wanted to go again so she could raise her hands and not hold on. I think she's going to be my daredevil...

By 3:30, it was officially time for a hotel break. Mike had been itching to ride some big-boy rides, so we left my (extremely giddy) husband at the park while we took the kids home for a rest. Two hours later, we returned to a refreshed Daddy and all enjoyed ice cream while we watched the parade. The evening was spent plowing through things like Flying Dumbos, the Carousal, the Tea Cups, Mr. Toads Wild Ride, and the Storybook boat. We finished off the night with fireworks and lollipops and everyone was home and in bed by 10:30. Jason's latest night ever.

Before heading home on Monday, we hit the beach for a couple of hours. Jason wanted nothing to do with the water, while the big kids (65 degrees and all) couldn't stay out of it. I got in a short run and helped the kids make a sandman (instead of a snowman) before we had to pack up and head out of town.

But not before our battery almost died and needed to be changed at Walmart! Oh, and did I mention Mike accidentally backed the car into a pole and took out my review mirror? Vacations just wouldn't be vacations without a little drama.

All in all: I'm glad we went. But I'm more glad to be home!

#46 - Build a snowman with the kids

2011-09-19T22:46:00.001-07:00

Is this cheating? Yes, technically it is. Well, not technically, because it's not even made of snow...let's just call a spade a spade, shall we?

But WHERE am I supposed to find snow in September in Arizona?!?! Somehow, in the last 3 winters since creating my 101 in 1001 list, I haven't managed to make it to a decent, snowman-building area with the kids. Sure, we went sledding, but no snowman was built.

So I had to improvise. I thought of various ways to build a snowman with the kids, and finally settled on a little sandman at the beach this morning.

Go ahead...call me a cheater if you must, but sometimes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do to beat a deadline.

#97 - Research an inexpensive, good quality skin care regimen and stick to it

2011-09-16T10:34:00.001-07:00

Plowing through the rest of my 101 Goals in 1001 Days hasn't been easy! I'm normally an excellent procrastinator (I work best under pressure) but I've just been too busy.

Thank goodness for my sweet friend, Alison. She is determined to help me cross off as many of the remaining things as possible AND she's a Mary Kay consultant, so she hooked me up with a new skin care regimen for my birthday!!!

One morning this week, she came over and did me up all pretty, teaching me how to use her company's amazing skin care products. And I am officially hooked!!!

This is my before and after pic...different lighting and a smart phone made for hard-to-tell-the-difference pictures, but I promise you, my pores were screaming THANK YOU at the top of their little lungs. Well, they would have been if they had lungs...

Jessica's Pantry Makeover

2011-09-13T13:38:00.002-07:00

This summer, while I was on my pantry organizing binge, I had a quick morning at my sweet, then-pregnant friend, Jessica's house. Her pantry was filled with bulk purchases from her recent trip to Costco. As I looked at eight bags of spaghetti and giant boxes of cereal, I suggested that she might not need the mass quantity of food that Costco offers, no matter how good of a deal it is. Her family is too small for bulk buying: just her husband, her and their 20 month old daughter. Her pantry had plenty of space, but she just had too much food.

As I emptied off shelf after shelf, I overheard her nesting: "I think this is stale (toss) ... and I don't even like these (toss) ... I'm sure we can get rid of these (toss) ..." She filled her kitchen table with items that would be thrown out.

Then we pulled items from their boxes (like granola bars and other snacks) and put them in canvas bins from IKEA. We grouped things by category (breakfast, dinner, snacks, cans, seasonings, baby, etc) and started putting everything back.

Before

2 hours later...not completely done yet...

After a trip to IKEA, she finished up on her own. She even used her red label maker to label containers!

I love me some pantry makeovers!!!

#79 - Give myself a pedicure 3 months in a row

2011-09-10T10:19:00.012-07:00

Do you love my finger toes? I was relentlessly teased by my friends in college. So go ahead and laugh. Sticks and stones...

Thanks to an amazing new discovery (Miracle of Aloe Cracked Heel Stick) I have been able to keep my feet soft and crack-free. Miracle is the right word for it! And it lasts forever. I'm still only a fraction through the stick and I've been using it for months!

So that made it much easier to attempt to keep my feet and toes pretty all summer. I avoided this for more than two years, but #79 is officially crossed off my 101 in 1001 list!

#33 - Learn how to use my MP3 player

2011-09-09T22:18:00.000-07:00

It's about time! Since adding #33 to my list of 101 Goals in 1001 Days, I received and iPod Shuffle for my birthday (um, *ahem* last year) and I finally know how to download songs and use it for my workouts! I'm seriously so excited. I plan to load up my old, unused MP3 player with music for Ryan and give it to him. But apparently, I need some converter software, blah blah blah...I'll deal with that later. Maybe I'll wrap it up and give it to him for Christmas...?

Wanna see my playlist? I don't listen to much mainstream music, but these songs make me want to dance my pants off. I'm going to look like a fool bee-boppin' around on the treadmill at the gym. (Sidenote...I had NO idea I liked the Black Eyed Peas so much! They are just too catchy.)

Crazy in Love & Single Ladies - Beyonce
Boom Boom Pow & I Gotta Feeling & Imma Be - Black Eyed Peas
Yeah & OMG - Usher
Lose Yourself - Eminem
Low & Right Round - Flo Rida
Hollaback Girl - Gwen Stefani
On the Floor - Jennifer Lopez

I have some slower Christian songs for my cool down, but I exclusively listen to KLove except when I'm at the gym, so I kind of feel like I need something different to pump me up for my workouts, you know?

Do you have any must-have songs for my playlist? I'm taking suggestions. I have some money leftover from my free iTunes gift cards from Swagbucks.

So...out with it. Leave a comment with your top 5 songs on your playlist!

An Interview with my new Kindergartener

2011-09-07T21:46:00.002-07:00

(immediately after finishing my interview with Ryan, Kaylin wandered up the stairs)

Kaylin: Is it my turn to talk yet?

Me: Yup!

Kaylin: What did you talk to Ryan about?

Me: All sorts of stuff. What do you want to talk about?

Kaylin: I want to do what you did to Ryan! Ask me questions!!

Me: What's the best thing about Kindergarten?

Kaylin: That we sometimes get to play on the playground when it's not too hot.

Me: What do you like best about your teacher?

Kaylin: Sometimes we get to play games and sometimes we get to make crafts.

Me: Who's your favorite friend in class?

Kaylin: Avery. I always put my backpack by her and sit by her on the bus.

Me: Anyone else?

Kaylin: No. The boys at my table are mean to me. They take the markers on their side of the table and say, "You can't have any markers." And they say that the teacher talks too much.

Me: What's your favorite thing to do...not in school?

Kaylin: Ride on the bus!

Me: What's fun about that?

Kaylin: Because we don't have to wear seat belts. There's just no room for seat belts. So...what's the 'nother question?

Me: What's your favorite thing to do with Daddy?

Kaylin: Go to Chick Fil A and play there and have a smoothie or chocolate milk, because chocolate milk is DEEEElicious!

Me: Where's your favorite place to go with me?

Kaylin: Chick Fil A!

Me: You keep saying this. We hardly ever go there.

Kaylin: But I like it!

Me: What's your favorite outfit to wear?

Kaylin: Dresses. And skirts and shirts. I'll show you... (disappears into her bedroom and pulls out the dress she wore on the first day of school)

Me: Okay, sweetie, I think we're about done here. I can't think of any more questions. Can you?

Kaylin: Nope...that's all!

An Interview with Ryan, 7 years old

2011-09-06T15:28:00.001-07:00

Me: Hey Ryan, c'mere. I want to ask you a few questions.

Ryan: Okay.

Me: What's it like in 2nd grade?

Ryan: Um, 7 years...? I don't get it...

Me: What do you like best about 2nd grade?

Ryan: Everything. Except math.

Me: Why don't you like math?

Ryan: Well, yeah, I do like math.

Me: Why did you say you didn't like math?

Ryan: Are you emailing this to my teacher?

Me: NO! (laughing - he noticed I was typing as he talked) Why did you say you didn't like math?

Ryan: Because...um...I don't know. It's just too hard for me. I like everything.

Me: Do you like your new class?

Ryan: Yeah. Except Veronica's not in my class. (She was his little 1st grade friend who is doing school at home now. She was supposed to have the same teacher this year and Ryan is still bummed.)

Me: Who's your favorite friend this year?

Ryan: Matthew.

Me: What do you like best about Matthew?

Ryan: Oh, I forgot! He's not my favorite person in the class anymore. He said he hates me. Because I said I wanted to play with Ainsley at recess and that I'd play with him on Monday, then Ainsley went over and said that she wanted to play with me on Monday too, so Matthew started running away and then I tried to get his attention, but he kept running then when we got back to class I asked if he is still my friend and he said, "no."

Me: Wow. It must be hard being in 2nd grade.

Ryan: Why are you doing this? (peeking at the computer screen) What are you doing?

Me: Nothing. Please sit back down.

Ryan: Is it a story for me?

Me: Yes. Kind of.

Ryan: "Kind of?" That doesn't make any sense.

Me: It's for you when you're a grown up.

Ryan: Why is it for me when I'm a grown up? You didn't ask me these questions in 1st grade!

Me: Can we please move on? Which do you like better, basketball or football?

Ryan: Every time I play football, I say, "basketball," and every time I play football, I say, "basketball."

Me: Why do you think that is?

Ryan: Because it keeps getting harder and harder and harder.

Me: It's good to be challenged! That's how God grows you.

Ryan: Yeah, I know.

Me: What do you think you're best at?

Ryan: What do you mean?

Me: What are you better at than other people?

Ryan: Well, my favorite thing to do is electrical things: robots, video games, cameras, stuff like that.

Me: What kinds of things do you have trouble with?

Ryan: I have trouble with math, waiting for stuff...like waiting to go to Disneyland, waiting to go on the cruise, waiting to go Mexico when I'm nine...

Me: Wait, you're going to Mexico? For what?

Ryan: To build houses for people.

Me: Oh, for a mission trip?

Ryan: YES! What day is today? September...what...?

Me: Fifth. (I hear faint screaming from behind Ryan's closed bedroom door)

Ryan: Jason's calling me.

Me: We're almost done. What is your favorite thing about Daddy?

Ryan: That he's teaching me football. And that he takes me swimming.

Me: What's your favorite thing about me?

Ryan: Uh... (long pause...I'm a little hurt) I don't know, there's lots of things! (much better) That you always give us special snacks after school. Like the Rice Krispie treats with the chocolate on top. Remember?

Me: Yes, I remember. That was just last week.

Ryan: What were those called?

Me: Chocolate Peanut Butter Rice Krispie Treats. (if you look at the recipe, you must know that I melted a combo of chocolate and butterscotch chips and poured them over the top...they were delicious)

Ryan: Yeah, those. They were good.

Me: Can you tell me 3 things about yourself?

Ryan: I went camping, I play football...

Me: I was thinking more like characteristics.

Ryan: What do you mean?

Me: Like that you're funny or smart...things like that.

Ryan: I'm actually funny to Matthew. (laughing to himself) I know he's going to forget that he's not my friend anymore. I know he'll forget.

Me: He thinks you're funny?

Ryan: Yeah, like when he said, "Why did the Kit Kat go around the world?" and I said, "Because he had to go to sleep," and he said, "Yeah! That's right!" The picture was of the Kit Kat peeking out of a sleeping bag. (I have no clue what he's talking about.)

Me: I think Daddy wants you to get ready for football practice now.

Ryan: Okay. Can I wear my swimsuit to football practice?

Me: Um, no.

Potty Training, Take 2

2011-09-05T15:27:00.000-07:00

Remember last month when I said I'd try potty training Jason after the kids were back in school? Well, it came a little too early for me.

Last weekend, Mike noticed that Jason got out of the pool to pee in the grass (yes, like a dog) at least three times. So when he learned that I would be at home all morning Monday, babysitting a friend of Kaylin's, he suggested that I give potty training another try.

Sure enough, Jason was a champ. I kept his bottoms off all day and he didn't have an accident until 5:00. The next day, we had a #2 accident...all over the place. While I had a guest over. But I won't sicken you with the details of how he dragged the door through it, accidentally stepped in it and left his poopy footprints along the path to sit on the potty seat, where it proceeded to smear further onto him, his clothes, and the seat.

The rest of the week went pretty well and I can say that he is officially daytime potty trained on #1. He's being a little stubborn with #2 and has only gone once on the potty, once on the floor (see above) and once in his diaper during a nap.

But I'm pretty excited about the fact that he's wearing his little Fruit of the Looms every day. His little butt is just stinkin' adorable in them!

Meal Plan 8/29/11

2011-08-30T14:55:00.003-07:00

Monday - Chicken Enchilada Quiche
Tuesday - Creamy Chicken Noodle Soup with Broccoli
Wednesday - Hamburgers and corn on the cob
Thursday -Feta-Topped Chicken *
Friday - DATE NIGHT (leftovers for the kids and my mom...sorry mom)
Saturday - Pot roast, carrots and potatoes in the crock pot
Sunday - Beef and Bulgar Stuffed Zucchini *

Desserts and Snacks
Banana Bread
Crispy Brown Rice Treats *

* Denotes new recipes...will report next week!

As if I wasn't already feeling old...

2011-08-26T22:10:00.000-07:00

This was the conversation...

Me: "What a great necklace!"
Carol: "Thanks! I got it at (insert store name here...it started with a B and I can't remember it). I was actually going to ask if you got your necklace there."
Me: "Huh - I've never heard of that place. My mom gave me this necklace for my birthday last week. Where is (insert name of store)?"
24 year old daughter: "They're all over. It's a jewelry store for old people."
Carol: "No it's NOT. I love their jewelry!" (Carol is probably in her 40s)
Daughter: "Exactly. I've made my point."

*Awkward silence as I realized that I liked the "old people necklace" on Carol and was complimented by "old" Carol on my own necklace given to me by my "old" mom.

Apparently I like old people jewelry. Or 35 is just simply ancient to a 24 year old...

Busy, Busy, BUSY

2011-08-24T14:07:00.002-07:00

Well, hello there! Yes, I am still alive and YES I realize it's very unlike me to go more than a week without posting. I've had time to write, just nothing really to write about. Nothing worthy of its own post, anyway. SO here are snippets of what's been happening around here...

Much to my surprise, I'm actually enjoying our back-to-school schedule. With Kaylin being at Kindergarten from the moment Jason goes down for his nap until the moment he wakes up...well, let's just say that I have a lot more quiet time than I'm used to! I've been catching up on absolutely everything. And Jason sleeps so much more soundly with the big kids out of the house!

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Ryan asked me to make waffles at 7:15 yesterday morning and I reluctantly agreed. Unfortunately, the first batch wasn't done until he was supposed to be walking out the door for the bus stop, so he ate a granola bar as he rushed out the door instead of the waffles that HE was craving.

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When I told Kaylin that she had her five year check up on Monday, she looked at me quite seriously and asked, "So they need to check to make sure I'm five?" She didn't understand why Mike and I almost peed our pants laughing.

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Yesterday, the phone rang as Ryan got home from school. I was upstairs and could faintly hear the front door close as I answered the phone. "Hello, this is the Transportation Department. Your son left Kaylin, on the bus and we don't allow Kindergarteners to walk home unescorted." I looked down at Ryan, taking his shoes off at the bottom of the stairs and casually said, "So, um...where's your sister?" Ryan looked around (like she was supposed to be hanging out somewhere) and freaked out as the man on the phone said, "If he runs to the next bus stop, we'll let her off there." And out the door he sprinted. Kaylin seemed unphased and, when asked why she didn't get off the bus, simply explained, "I was looking out the window and didn't realize we'd come to our stop," while Ryan said that he thought he was still in first grade and walked home alone. KIDS.

Ryan is trying to grow his hair longer and I am NOT pleased with his $7.99 Great Clips cut. Crooked much?

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On Monday, some girlfriends took me to a belated birthday lunch at a great local restaurant (3rd Place Grill) that has free childcare. Please don't judge me, but I guilt-less-ly brought Kaylin to school late that day. When filling out the sign in sheet, I left the "reason for tardy" section totally blank. What was I supposed to write? "...because I was selfish and had a magnificent 90 minute lunch with my girlfriends." Hardly. It's just Kindergarten, right...?

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This weekend, Mike's parents bought me a new lens for my camera for my birthday. It's the same lens the photographer used for our recent baking photo shoot. (50mm f1.8) It is my new favorite toy!!! I can get great bokeh at close range...

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I'm officially 35. Too old to be young and too young to be old. I don't feel 35. But Kaylin announced last night that she FINALLY feels five. Thank goodness...it only took eight days for her to feel five years old!

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Speaking of birthdays, Kaylin's favorite gift was a pink digital kid camera. This morning, I found said camera in my tub, speckled with water dropletts. Upon picking it up, I realized that a certain toddler (I won't name names) ran water on my daughter's prized birthday present. And it is now dead as a doornail. I think I was as crushed as Kaylin was. I don't like flushing money down the drain! Destructo-boy strikes again.

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My $500+ mouthguard is missing. (*sigh*) Jason tends to misplace items from my nightstand and I recently found the empty case on the floor. We've all searched the whole house, including the trash cans, and can't find my stupid mouthguard anywhere, so I've been grinding my teeth again which is causing me morning headaches. And I'm too cheap to buy another mouthguard. Curses!

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My dad's dad passed away yesterday. We had lost touch and were never really tight to begin with, so I'm not broken up about it, but it's the closest I've been to death since 1987. The really sad part is that he was a proud Atheist for the last few decades of his life. What a hopeless way to die.

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Yesterday, it was too hot outside for my kids to play at recess. The weather has simply been unbearable here! But I chose to let Kaylin ride the bus to school for the first time, despite the record-breaking heat index. And when I returned home from the bus stop, I totally needed a shower. These temperatures are really sabotaging my desire to cross #18 off my 101 in 1001 list, which requires hiking a steep mountain.

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I need to get on the ball and potty train Jason. He is so ready, but it's just so much easier to change a diaper a few times a day than it is to race him to the potty seat during meals, at the grocery store or while driving across town. Ugh. I just need to bear down and do it. Soon.

(This was Jason after I caught him hiding in my curtains...he emerged smelling like a port-a-potty)

I think that's it. A bunch of nothing, but my days are full and I find myself laughing at my kids a LOT lately. With them, at them, same difference. We all laugh together...does that sound less cruel??? I'm working on getting caught up on my Picture of the Day blog, so for those who follow that, check back in a day or two. If you've missed my Meal Plans, you can also look forward to seeing those again soon. I can't handle the thrown-together meals we've been having lately. I'm over it. And I have some fun new recipes to try. Can't wait!

Mission: Accomplished ... First Day of School

2011-08-15T14:44:00.053-07:00

Despite my hesitations and fears, the first day of school came and went without a hitch. We began the day with donut holes and a bunch of birthday wishes for our new Kindergartener.

We took our standard in-the-same-spot first day of school picture, but with a twist. I wish I could take credit for the adorable signs below, but a sweet friend forwarded the printables to me Sunday night. Click to see the detail. SO cute!

Mike took the day off, per the birthday girl's request, so we did everything as a family all day. Ryan began his day in the morning and we dropped off Kaylin for afternoon Kindergarten after lunch. Ryan's class has about 5-6 kids from his Kindergarten and 5-6 kids from last year, so he had plenty of familiar faces, despite the recent news that his best friend, Veronica, (who was originally in his class) will be homeschooling this year.

After dropping Ryan off, I took Kaylin for a birthday pedicure with one of her favorite people and her mom, who is one of my favorite people.

I went back to the school at 2:00 to bring ice cream sandwiches for her class, but forgot my camera. (Boo!) I looked around and noticed that her class has 15 boys and only 6 girls. Yikes! It's going to be an interesting year.

Ryan misunderstood where he was supposed to bring Kaylin for us to pick them up at the end of the day, so they were not at the curb at 3:00. We ran home to the bus stop to see if they got on the bus by accident, but they didn't, so we raced back to a near-empty school to find them sitting in the office. What's the first day of school without a little drama for the mama?

We ended the day with a birthday dinner for Kaylin, presents and cake.

My kids suddenly seem so mature to me. I truly hope we can keep the attitudes in check as we transition into the new school year! That is always a frustration.

Short videos of Jason, for your viewing pleasure...

2011-08-14T22:34:00.002-07:00

I finally uploaded a few videos of Jason and they are too hilarious not to share. First, we have my 21 month old genius spelling his name...

Next, is Jason playing Hide and Seek with the big kids. You might want to turn the volume down for this one...he screams, "One... Two... Seven... Fourteen... Twelve... Thirteen...here I come!" You can almost even see how red his face gets between numbers.

Finally, Jason is singing our night-night song to Kaylin's babydoll. I love his sweet voice, but the end of the video proves that he is all. boy. I could watch this a million times!

Kaylin's Hello Kitty 5th Birthday Party

2011-08-11T21:31:00.003-07:00

The day after Kaylin's 4th birthday party last year, she announced that she wanted her 5th birthday party to be a Hello Kitty theme. Sure enough, the idea stuck 12 months later!

Ryan suggested that we start the day with Hello Kitty pancakes. An oval pancake with batter pulled up for ears, chocolate chip eyes and leftover candies from the cupcakes. They turned out cute!

And, most importantly, Kaylin loved them...

A friend gifted me with some of her gently used Hello Kitty decorations and paper products, like a banner, the poster that we used for the bow game (below), a Hello Kitty bowl, plus plenty of leftover HK plates and cups.

Then I met a girl who made the most adorable hair clips. She gave me a discount for buying multiples and I was going to clip each one onto a toothpick, insert it into the cupcakes and that was going to be each girl's party favor. Are these cute or what?

Picture credit - I'm not saying. I don't want to embarrass the photographer who left me high and dry, without party favors the week before my daughter's party.

But bad news: the girl TOTALLY flaked on me a week before the party. A week. Before. The party. So instead, I bought a bunch of chochkie junk and filled goodie bags with the garbage that most moms hate. I wrote, "Hello Kaylin" and "Hello Elizabeth" and "Hello..." with each child's name on the tags. I'm sure someone else out there has come up with that idea, too, but I didn't get it from anyone specific, so I've decided that I came up with it on my own. Aren't I creative!?

Then during one of my multiple trips to Party City, I found a huge circular with reasonably-priced Hello Kitty items. After the goodie bags were stuffed. !!! So I decided buy enough prizes for all of the kids, and they played Hot Hello Kitty. (like hot potato, but we passed a Hello Kitty doll)

Ryan stuffed the prizes in Kaylin's new Hello Kitty purse and passed them around like a grown up. He was very excited about the fact that he was in charge of the games!

I bought very few HK decorations, since I had so many hand-me-downs. I went with pink and green for a color scheme...everywhere. We had pink, green and white balloons, pink and green table clothes, pink bead necklaces in a large glass jar, pink lollipops in a lidded glass jar, green peppermint candies in another glass jar, pink flowers, even pink and green foods included: pink marshmallows, green grapes, pink and white frosted animal cookies, watermelon balls, pink popcorn (red food coloring in melted butter, drizzled onto the popcorn) and sparkling pink lemonade.

Of course, I took pictures to share of my beautiful (I really was proud) table-scapes, but somehow, someway, I accidentally deleted them from the camera without downloading them.

On to the flow of the party: as guests arrived, we had a Hello Kitty movie playing while the kids colored HK pages at the kitchen table.

We also played "Pin the Bow on Hello Kitty" - I printed off a printable bow and added each child's name. Donkey's and tails are so 1980s.

(I had to get a picture of the baby brigade...many parents dropped Kaylin's friends off, but those who stayed seemed to all have babies!)

When we needed some downtime between activities, Ryan read the crowd a Hello Kitty story. He proudly showed everyone the pictures after reading each page.

For those of you who read my Hello Kitty Cake Pop disaster story earlier in the week, you will be happy to know that I decided to use my plethora of supplies to turn my chocolate cupcakes into Hello Kitty faces. I piled white frosting onto two white chocolate chips for "ears," used yellow candies (found at Party City) for the nose, Wilton red heart sprinkles and an upside-down mini M&M for the bow, and black gel frosting to draw the eyes and whiskers. Who needs cake pops, anyway?!?

We didn't have enough seating for all 16 kids (plus a few siblings) so we brought in the picnic tables from the backyard. As the kids began eating, Mike announced that the cleanest eater would get a prize. Sure enough, we had a fierce competition going with the older ones!

I actually DID end up passing out the defective, undecorated cake pops to the adults and they swooned. Apparently it doesn't matter that they weren't pretty...they still tasted great!

I'm seriously bummed that I don't have my beautiful table pictures to share with you. Oh well...God's probably trying to keep me humble! (Update: I was able to take a quick partial-picture of the front hall table, but this was after I'd removed the pink feather boa and after the basket full of goodie bags had all been sent home.)

I also just realized that I didn't get a picture of the birthday girl in her amazing outfit. At the last minute today, I found a skirt that matched her birthday shirt perfectly! Good thing she's wearing it all again on the first day of school, which is her actual birthday. She was just adorable.

Q&A Wednesday - Kindergarten Advice

2011-08-10T08:03:00.001-07:00

Teresa asked, "Any advice for a mommy who has a child going to Kindergarten?"

Every Kindergarten experience is so different. Depending on where you live, your school might have full or half day, a great school district or a mediocre one...it's so hard to say. It's a huge adjustment for most five year old kids. I remember when Ryan went to school, there were all-day Kindergarteners falling asleep on the bus on the way home each day. It's an overwhelming transition and a long, exhausting day!

In the beginning, expect your child to come home from school hungry and burned out. (it's worse on Thursdays and Fridays than it is on Mondays and Tuesdays) As soon as my kids are home from school, I go through their backpacks while they have a snack and some downtime. For the first 30 minutes, we talk about their day, who they sat by at lunch, go through highs and lows, look through paperwork that came home with them...basically let them decompress a little before diving into homework.

I started Ryan doing his homework at the kitchen table. Until he could read instructions, homework was very parent-lead. Now, we have a homework desk that is stocked with pencils, a pencil sharpener, scissors, glue, markers, etc.

The biggest thing I'm going to focus on with my new Kindergartener is having a good attitude. She's a really good kid, especially when she's away from home, but she gets her feelings hurt easily, so I'll work on strengthening her confidence for sure. (Girls can be so snotty and I dread that drama!) When she comes home with a bad attitude, I expect to deprogram her from what is (much more widely) acceptable at school, guiding her back on track with the way things are done in our family and in our home.

That being said, I guess I'd recommend that you start with what you require of your children at home. We have a list of House Rules that our kids know they are expected to follow whether they are at home or away, with us or in someone else's care. When I first developed our list of rules, we went over them every morning at breakfast for weeks, even months. Then when a rule was disobeyed, I'd quote the exact verbiage from the list, cementing the concept into everyone's head even further.

Whenever you send a child to a new environment, I would recommend focusing on the principle of "Do what's right, even when others don't and even when no one is looking." That single idea encompasses so many decisions kids (and adults!) make every day.

Explain to your child that when other kids talk back to the teacher or test the boundaries, they need to stand firm and "do what's right." When they have the opportunity to cheat on a test, they need to "do what's right." When a child on the playground is excluding someone else from playing, yours should include them because it's the right thing to do.

Everything can be a teachable moment. But don't wait for situations to arise and smack you in the face...be proactive and go through what-if scenarios to set your child up for success beforehand.

This parenting thing is tough! Even more when the kids are away from home for eight hours a day, being introduced to new attitudes and behaviors. On the positive side, for kids who are out of control, starting school can really ground them. The social pressures of sitting still during story time, walking in a line to the library and following directions in general can be such a blessing for some parents!!!

I hope that answers your question, Teresa. Get excited for Kindergarten...it's a great transition into big-kid school and your child will mature SO much in the next few months. I'm getting teary-eyed just thinking about it...